Love is Hard
by NejiKikyoAnimeRose
Summary: Sasuke lost his love and fell to depression. His daughter was taken form him and his life hit an all time low. NaruSasu and eventual NejiSasu
1. Death

The rain fell down, though he felt it not. He did not know it was raining. He did not know the world was sad. He did not know that there was a world. All he knew was his own sadness. His own intense sadness and sorrow.

He was dead inside. His soul had died with his lover, the only difference being, that his body was destined to live on the hell hole called Earth until his time came. And that killed him even more.

Sasuke Uchiha stood by the now closed casket of his partner and lover. Uzumaki Naruto. The man who had stood by him for six years.

The wood shone in the bright liquid coating of the rain. The flowers drooped, sharing the raven haired man's anguish. Tears stung his eyes readily. The knife that was now within his heart twisted painfully. _He's gone. My love is gone._

"Daddy!" The raven turned to see a small child coming toward him. His child. _Their_ child. The child Naruto had had with the surrogate mother five years ago. The only real thing that was left of him. And at the same time, the one thing Sasuke could never bring himself to openly love again.

The young child, a girl named Shihu flung her arms around her father, seeking comfort.

"Daddy!" she cried again. Sasuke's heart jerked under the pressure of the knife, now twisting ten times harder. He winced. He wanted to pry her off of him. But he couldn't.

With a great amount of effort, the Uchiha forced his head down to look at her. Her hair was a dark blonde color. It was long but wild. Wild like Naruto's. Her eyes were a light sparkling blue color. Like Naruto's. Her face, though, was clean and without the cat whisker marks that the Uzumaki's face had sported. Her expressions and mannerisms were from the mother, though. Nothing was Sasuke's. She wasn't even his child anymore. She was just a child. The Uchiha had always convinced himself that as long as he was linked with Naruto he was linked with the beautiful young daughter that he loved so much. But now, his link to her had broken and they were no longer connected.

But, even so, Sasuke couldn't let her go. And he wouldn't. He would stay with her and try to rebuild his life with her. That much, he promised himself. Then, at least her life might turn out well.

It was too late for him, though. Naruto had been his life and was now gone.

"Sasuke, you gonna be okay?" A man Sasuke's age and a very close friend of Naruto's approached the Uchiha. His black eyes were wrought with concern. His hair, normally kept in a spiked ponytail was down. He put a hand on Sasuke's shoulder. The raven shook his head.

"I don't think so," he said, his voice wavering. "I'll try to be though." He tried to smile reassuringly, but his mouth wouldn't obey him anymore. The man's concerned look deepened.

"If you need anything, you know you can come to me," he said. Sasuke nodded.

"Thanks, Shikamaru," he said, though the thanks was empty. Shikamaru nodded and turned away. Nearby, his good friends Ino Yamanaka and Chouji Akimichi stood, looking at Sasuke with concerned and sympathetic expressions on their faces. As Shikamaru approached them, Ino, a blonde young woman, started to ask him a question, but he held out his hand, stopping her and shaking his head. Chouji sighed and took one last sad look at Sasuke before turning and walking away with Shikamaru and Ino.

Sasuke sighed and knelt down to pick up Shihu. He took the girl in his arms and she buried her head in his chest, crying. She was small and naïve, but she understood death. Much more than Sasuke believed a girl of her age should.

He hugged her close but the embrace was empty. There was no comfort, no love. For Sasuke was seeking those things as much as Shihu was.

And he knew he would never find them.

Sasuke took Shihu back to their house. An average two-story building that both he and Naruto had paid for and lived in. The house that Shihu grew up in and the house that Sasuke had loved.

Now the house full to the brim of nothing but memories.

Sasuke walked into the dark house and flipped on the lights. Instantaneously his life with the now deceased Naruto was glaring at him. Sasuke visibly winced. He took a breath and climbed the stairs to Shihu's room. The girl was shuddering in his arms, frequent sobs escaping her lips.

He walked down the halls, trying to ignore the nostalgic voices in his head, and finally reached his daughter's room. He put her to bed, ignoring her question of whether everything would be alright. He shut the door and leaned back against it, listening to her pain-filled sobbing and was soon moved to tears himself. He sank back against the wall, his hand on his forehead and his other clenched in a fist against the floor. He curled up and waited inside himself for the pain to pass. But he knew it never would.

Slowly, and with the hollow air that had become normal for him, Sasuke stood and walked away from Shihu's room. He walked down the stairs and into what was the family room. There was the couch, a gift from Naruto's best friend Sakura and her family. Hanging above it there was a beautiful still life of the most beautiful flowers Sasuke had ever seen, courtesy of Ino and her family. To the side of the family room and standing by a large and picturesque window was the beautiful grand piano that Shihu was practicing piano with. She was actually starting to get better. But she had put it down as soon as Naruto died.

Sasuke felt the emotion clog in his throat and he gagged. He quickly shut his eyes and turned away. The memories were too vivid. Even when he wasn't looking at anything that would remind him. It was still too clear.

The way he and Naruto had always sat together on the couch, him to the right and Naruto to the left. Naruto would put an arm around him and pull him in, the goofy grin on his face. And then he would kiss Sasuke's head. And then Shihu would run in and jump on Sasuke's lap and he would smile and tickle her and then Naruto would smile and tickle him. It had been such a happy time.

Sasuke sighed and walked into the kitchen. The table stood where it always had, the three chairs where they always were. The stove was at it always was and sat by the wall, lonely and unused. One of the burners had a permanent stain that was the result of a rather unfortunate cooking accident on Naruto's part. Sasuke had, for that reason, refused to clean it. He was being stupid, he knew, but he couldn't help it.

He quickly left the kitchen and found his way into the dining room. It was never used by them, except when they had company, and even then, it was used most informally.

Sasuke's eyes were drawn to a small intricate table and his breath hitched in his throat. That was where that hideous vase stood. Sasuke had always hated it and had always tried to get Naruto to get rid of it. But the Uzumaki had refused. Painted on the vase were small creatures that Sasuke always believed were foxes, but was never sure. It had made him wince every time he walked in the room. Once he had been so angry with Naruto that he had tried to throw it away, but Naruto had come in just in time to save it from the wrath of the Uchiha.

Sasuke's mouth was parted slightly, his eyes reflecting sadness and his body was frozen for a moment. The vase had never looked as beautiful as it was now. Sasuke walked over to it and sank to his knees, taking it carefully from its place of rest and hugging it close to him. Naruto had loved it, and so he loved it. It was simple.

That was Sasuke's night. A night of unwelcome memories that he never wanted to leave. A night of a lost love that would never return. That would never be rekindled.

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**Okay, first chptr of this fic. Tell me if it was good or if I should just abandon the idea. I kinda wrote it on impulse. **

**This will become a NejiSasu fic, but it will take time and reviews. This is my first fic with Sasuke as the uke. :3**


	2. Handling Loss

Sasuke fell asleep that night on the couch. He didn't think he'd ever have the courage to go back into the bedroom that he and Naruto once shared. That would hurt far too much.

As his eyes fluttered closed and his mind slowly ground to a halt, the Uchiha felt he had found some form of peace at last.

But it didn't last. What felt like a moment later, Sasuke felt himself awaken. His eyes opened slowly and he blinked to focus his blurred vision. His eyes, as they swiveled around, taking in his surroundings, fell on something he never thought he'd see again.

"Naruto!" Sasuke cried. Leaping up and off the couch, the Uchiha threw himself in the blonde's arms. He buried his head in the Uzumaki's chest and clenched his eyes shut, managing to keep the tears at bay. At least until he heard Naruto's voice.

"Sshhh, it's okay Sasuke," the blonde said. Sasuke's heart jerked at the voice.

"No, it's not," he said. "I know this is a dream. And I never want to wake up."

"But, you know you will. Calm down." Naruto lifted Sasuke's head up to his and looked hard in his lover's eyes. Sasuke's desperate hold on him tightened.

"Don't leave," he pleaded, his voice barely more than a whisper. "Don't leave me again." Naruto shook his head. He opened his mouth and spoke, but this time his voice was high and light and familiar.

"Daddy!" he said. "Daddy, wake up!" Sasuke blinked as Naruto's image began to fade.

"No! Naruto don't go, I love you!" Sasuke shouted.

"Daddy, are you okay?"

"Naruto…"

"Daddy..?"

Sasuke's eyes snapped open and he bolted up. He was still on the couch, sweating and panting. Shihu stood next to him, eyes wide and filled with fear. Her hand was out as though it was on his arm, but had been shaken off. The Uchiha turned to her and she instinctively took a step back.

"Daddy, do you want me to call the ambliance?" she asked timidly. Sasuke laughed softly at her words.

"No, Shihu, I don't want you to call the ambliance," he replied. "Daddy was just having a bad dream. That's all." Shihu's eyes relaxed.

"Do you want me to sing to you?" she asked lightly. Sasuke looked at her hopeful face and nodded.

"Yes, please sing to me," he said. He reached out and lifted her up onto his lap. She beamed at him and started her song.

**Hush, little daddy don't say a word**

**Shihu's gonna buy you a mocking bird**

**And if that mocking bird don't sing**

**Then Shihu's gonna buy you a diamond ring…**

When Shihu finished her song, she reached up and patted Sasuke's head, smiling.

"Do you feel better, Daddy?" she asked. Sasuke grinned and nodded.

"Yes, I do, Shihu," he said. "Now, I think you should stay home for a few days. At least until we…get back in the swing of things." Shihu looked at him.

"You mean, because Father died?" she asked, ignorant of how blunt it was. Sasuke flinched.

"Yes, because Father died," he choked. He quickly put her down and told her to go play. When she complied, he lay back down on the couch, thinking of Naruto and why he had to leave.

Because of the disease. The disease that Naruto had had since birth. No one really knew how he acquired it. But it basically guaranteed his early death. So, ultimately, Sasuke knew that his death was coming, and it still surprised him.

Sasuke shut his eyes, trying to shake the thought from his mind. But it still clung. Still clung to his awareness like a dew drop to a leaf. There was really only one thing that could make him forget, aside from suicide.

Alcohol.

Sasuke made up his mind. Going into the kitchen, he went straight to the phone. Shihu was at the table trying to complete a puzzle. She smiled at Sasuke as he entered the room, but he ignored her. He quickly picked up the phone and dialed the number of their long time babysitter. She agreed to come over, and Sasuke told his daughter that he was going out and that she would be spending time with the babysitter. Shihu smiled.

"Tsukiko?" she asked. Sasuke nodded, getting his coat. A minute later the doorbell sounded and the Uchiha gratefully answered it, letting the young girl in.

"How are you doing?" Tsukiko asked carefully. Sasuke shrugged.

"At the moment, pretty bad," he replied. Tsukiko looked sympathetic.

"I'm so sorry," she said. "I know it doesn't mean much, but…" She broke off. Sasuke waved her apology away.

"It's alright," he said. "Thank you for coming over on such short notice." Tsukiko nodded and went to find Shihu. Sasuke turned and left. He quickly opened the door to his car and got in. He shoved the key roughly into the ignition and turned hard. The car rumbled to life and he put it in reverse. Looking out the back window and ignoring Shihu's frantic farewell waves to him, he backed out of the driveway and sped off.

He drove down the still slightly damp road, headed to the one place that he knew would at least comfort him temporarily.

He turned onto a small side road and drove slowly until he saw the familiar sign. He sighed and turned into the parking lot. He found a space near the entrance and parked the car. Getting out, he locked the doors and hurried into the fairly small building. It had always been his favorite bar.

He pushed the door open and hurried to the long counter. He sat down and ordered a beer. He downed it quickly and ordered another. The process was repeated again. And again. And again. Until Sasuke was hammered out of his mind. Though he was very good at hiding it. He had always been very good at hiding things.

"Sasuke, man, are you okay?" a very concerned Kiba asked the drunk raven from behind the counter. Sasuke nodded.

"I'm fine," he insisted, though his very red face betrayed his claim. He stood and Kiba noticed he was a little wobbly on his feet. Thinking rationally, the Inuzuka offered to take Sasuke home. When Sasuke refused, Kiba shook his head and told him he couldn't drive in his intoxicated state. He disappeared into the back of the bar and a moment later emerged again. He walked around the bar, his position having been taken by an older man with graying black hair, and put the Uchiha's arm around his shoulder. He walked Sasuke to his car and took the keys from the weakly protesting Uchiha and helped him into the passenger seat. Then, Kiba walked around and got into the car on the driver side. He put the key into the ignition and started the car. Backing out into the street, his eyes flashed quickly to Sasuke.

"So, how are you doing, Sasuke?" the Inuzuka asked carefully. Sasuke lurched backward as the car accelerated.

"Horrible," he said, the word slightly slurred. Kiba nodded. Figured.

"How's Shihu?" he asked. Sasuke shrugged.

"How am I supposed to know?" he asked bitterly. "I'm not her father." Kiba blinked. He didn't know what to say to that.

"Oh," was all he could manage. Sasuke turned to the window and his head fell forward, hitting it. Kiba winced at the sharp sound but Sasuke didn't seem to mind. They drove in silence until the alcohol finally took its full toll on Sasuke and he screamed, "Naruto's gone!" Kiba jumped and struggled to keep the car from swerving. He blinked, turning his head to face Sasuke momentarily, before returning his attentions to the road.

"I know," he said quietly. The Uchiha started shaking beside him and he leaned over, his head sagging over Kiba's arm.

"I miss him," Sasuke said. Kiba was silent. It was amazing how easily a lot of alcohol could loosen a person's tongue. The Inuzuka gently pushed Sasuke's head off of his shoulder.

"I know, Sasuke," he said carefully, keeping in mind Sasuke's incredible temper and how easily it could be triggered, especially if he was drunk. "But, you've got to start thinking about other things. Like Shihu." Sasuke made a noise that sounded oddly like a scoff, but that changed quickly to a cough.

"How can I?" he said, the words now spilling uncontrollably from his mouth. "It's not as though I had anything to do with her. The only reason I ever put up with her was because she was Naruto's kid." Kiba felt, if possible, even more awkward. Sasuke had never spoken this easily of personal matters. It was slightly disconcerting. And the Inuzuka, who had never been close enough to Sasuke to discuss such matters, didn't know quite what to say. He only hoped Sasuke didn't want advice in this unfamiliar, drunken state.

"I'm a terrible person," Sasuke emoted suddenly. Kiba looked quickly at him and said the first thing that came to his mind.

"No you're not." Sasuke sniggered.

"Yes I am," he persisted. "I don't even love my own daughter." Kiba would've replied, "You just said you weren't her father." Though he refrained, for he knew it wasn't the right thing to say. Come to think of it, he didn't know what the right thing to say was. He only knew that Sasuke needed a nice long nap as soon as he got to his house.

The car was silent for the remainder of the trip, the only sound being Sasuke's uneven breathing as a result of the much too large dosage of alcohol.

Kiba pulled into Sasuke's driveway and pulled the now very wobbly Sasuke out of the car. He walked the Uchiha carefully up the steps to his house.

Inside Sasuke's house, Tsukiko had gotten a quick glimpse of Sasuke, and that was all she needed to see to send Shihu up to her room. She quickly hurried to the door when she heard the doorbell and pulled it open, hurrying to help Kiba settle Sasuke on the couch.

"What happened?" she asked the Inuzuka. Kiba shook his head resignedly.

"He's handling loss," he said. Tsukiko blinked, not quite understanding the meaning at first. Then comprehension dawned on her and she turned a pitiful gaze on the Uchiha, now lying rigidly on the couch.

"You can both get the hell out of my house now," Sasuke grumped from his resting place. Kiba and Tsukiko started and the latter's eyes darted up to Shihu's room. Kiba, following her gaze and immediately understanding, said, "Shouldn't you let the babysitter take Shihu for the night?" Sasuke's eyes snapped open and fell on Kiba, making him wince. Slowly and unsteadily, he dragged himself to his feet and glared the Inuzuka in the eye.

"Shouldn't you be getting the hell out of my house now?" he hissed, the smell of alcohol on his breath stinging the Inuzuka's rather sensitive nose. When Kiba hesitated, Sasuke leaned into him, pushing him to the door. Kiba was slow to react and was soon shoved out onto the driveway, the door being slammed in his face. Sasuke quickly locked it and turned to Tsukiko, who took a step backward.

"You can leave out the back way," Sasuke mumbled, pointing shakily to the kitchen door. "Get out." Tsukiko jumped and quickly hurried out of the house, shutting the door rather loudly behind her. Sasuke sighed and hurried to the bathroom. Shutting the door and leaning over the toilet bowl, he felt some of his alcohol forcing its way back up through his throat. He opened his mouth and retched. The bitter stuff fell into the bowl and Sasuke quickly pushed down on the silver lever, watching it swirl and then disappear. He reached out and grabbed a tissue, wiping his mouth and breathing heavily.

He heard a knock on the door and didn't answer. A moment later he heard Shihu's voice through the door.

"Daddy?" she asked, her high voice slightly muffled. "Daddy, are you okay?" Sasuke turned to the door angrily.

"No, I'm not okay, Shihu!" he shouted. "And Daddy just wants you to leave him the hell alone!" He turned back to the toilet and vomited into it once again, missing his daughter's scared and frightened breaths, and hearing her only rush away, crying. He rolled his eyes. _Damn kid._ He thought bitterly.

Shihu ran to her room and slammed the door, flinging herself onto her bed. She buried her head in her pillow and began to cry.

What was going on with her daddy? Why was he acting so mean to her? She knew he loved Father but she though he loved her too. Was she wrong? Did Daddy hate her?

Shihu cried harder into the pillow, bringing it closer to her, seeking comfort in the soft warm object that seemed to be her only escape. She didn't want her daddy to be like this. She wanted him to be happy. She wanted to make him happy. More than anything she wanted them to be a family.

Sasuke walked out of the bathroom still drunk, but more miserable than ever. The constant vomiting had made him exhausted and he had yelled at Shihu. Perfect.

The Uchiha walked absentmindedly up the stairs and into his and Naruto's bedroom. He stopped short as soon as he realized where he was. His eyes widened as they fell on the bed, still unmade from the last time he and Naruto had slept in it together. Sasuke's body twitched as the memories forced their way back into his mind.

When Naruto would slam Sasuke down against the sheets, intoxicated with lust; a lust that was soon given life within Sasuke as well. When the room would be filled with groans and gasps and breathy whispers that all emanated from that very bed. The time Shihu had walked in on them and asked what they were doing, to which a very flushed Naruto replied, "We're just playing hide and seek. And I just found Daddy hiding in the bed." Shihu's face had lit up at that and she took a running leap onto the bed, shouting, "I want to play too!" Naruto had inaudibly groaned and Sasuke had laughed, shoving the Uzumaki off of him and pulling the blankets up to more effectively cover their naked forms.

Sasuke laughed as he remembered. It had been such a happy life he had shared with them. But now it was gone, Sasuke realized as he sank to the floor, his hands clutching at his head.

"Daddy?" Sasuke turned slowly to see Shihu standing at a safe distance from him, a worried look on her face. He started slowly towards her and she flinched.

"Are you going to yell at me?" she asked. Sasuke felt tears threaten as the regret pushed its way into him.

"No, I'm not going to yell at you, Shihu," he whispered. "I'm sorry." He moved towards her again and this time she moved to meet him. She ran into his arms and clamped her small hands on his shirt as he tightened his arms around her. Slowly he lifted her up and carried her down the stairs to the couch. He quickly sat down before he could fall. Shihu nestled into him and he heard her breath even out after a moment, indicating that she had fallen asleep. He held her in his arms for a moment before he fell asleep himself.

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**Okay, still very early in this fic and I need reviews to see if it's going well so far. Sasuke's still getting over Naruto and his going out to drink is going to become a serious problem, hint hint.**

**And "ambliance" is Shihu's way fo saying "ambulance." That's how I used to say it when I was five. **

**Review please.**


	3. Attack

He woke after what seemed like one short moment and his eyes flashed to a clock that hung on the wall. 6:48. It was about time for him to make dinner. As he always used to. He carefully placed Shihu on the couch, trying not to wake her. Slowly and still unsteadily he got to his feet and walked to the kitchen. He was still slightly drunk, but he could at least cook. He put a pan on the stove and filled it with water. He turned the burner on and waited for the water to boil. He took out a box of pasta and set it on the counter. Shihu had always loved pasta. So did Naruto. Ramen, specifically. In fact, ramen was where the stain on the stove had come from. Sasuke smiled at the memory.

As the water began to bubble and boil, Sasuke removed the lid and added the pasta. He set the timer for the specified number of minutes and moved to the table to wait. He sat down and put his head in his hands, thinking. And waiting for all the alcohol he'd had to burn off. His stomach churned and he knew that another trip to the bathroom was nearing. Just as the timer went off, Sasuke was running for the toilet yet again, and his stomach relieved itself of its contents. He arrived back to the kitchen and saw that the water was nearly boiling over the side of the pot. Quickly and gracelessly he switched the burner off, but as he did so a splash of water found his skin and there it sizzled for a moment before cooling off.

"Shit!" Sasuke swore to himself, rubbing his wrist where the water had landed. Immediately, his eyes glanced to the living room, to make sure that Shihu hadn't been woken. When he saw that she hadn't he removed the pan from the stove and drained the pasta. He moved to the fridge and extracted from it unsalted butter. Naruto had always stressed healthy eating habits, despite his rather unhealthy own. Sasuke buttered the pasta and placed some onto a small plate. He decided that not eating anything at all would do his stomach well. He walked silently into the living room and gently shook Shihu awake. Her eyes fluttered sleepily open and she smiled at him.

"Hello, Daddy," she said quietly. Sasuke smiled back at her.

"Hey, Shihu," he replied, his voice just as quiet. "Dinner's ready." The girl's eyes brightened.

"Okay," she said excitedly. "What are we eating?"

"Pasta."

"Yay!" The blonde girl jumped from the couch and pulled Sasuke into the kitchen, sitting at the table and grabbing her fork, preparing to eat. Then she noticed that no plate had been set for Sasuke.

"Daddy, aren't you eating?" she asked, confused. Sasuke shook his head.

"Daddy doesn't feel so good, Shihu," he said. "But it looks delicious and you'd better eat it if you want to grow up big and strong." Shihu nodded and made a face that she always called her "strong face." She creased her brows and pursed her lips. She puffed out her chest and sat tall and proud. It had always made Sasuke and Naruto laugh. And Sasuke was still inclined to chuckle at it. But it seemed to lose some of its former cuteness without Naruto there to laugh with him.

Sasuke sat with Shihu as she ate her food and thought about how her life would be affected by this. She seemed to be handling Naruto's death very well, considering how sudden and traumatic it had been. He wondered if that was because she was really able to move on or if it was because the innocence and ignorance normally found within children had allowed her to move on. Sasuke was inclined to think that the latter option was closer to the truth. For some reason he wished that she would mourn as openly as he. It didn't make sense to him, the logic tied to it, but it seemed right for some reason. As though, if she did not then she would be pushed further from their small and weak family.

"Daddy, I'm done!" Shihu announced. Sasuke smiled. He knew what came next. He threw his arms into the air, stretching them as high as they would go and shouted, "Ta-da!" Shihu smiled and mimicked his actions. She giggled and hopped down from the chair.

"Daddy, tuck me in!" she cried. Sasuke smiled and bent down to pick her up but his stomach lurched. He quickly straightened.

"Shihu, Daddy's not feeling too well, so just tuck yourself in tonight, okay?" he asked. Shihu nodded in an understanding way.

"Alright, Daddy," she said. "Good night." She tugged on his arm and he leaned over. Shihu quickly kissed his cheek and then ran up the stairs, taking two at a time. Sasuke watched her go before, once again, charging to the bathroom. He spent a good portion of the night leaning over the toilet.

The next morning, Sasuke slept in. Or attempted to. Shihu interrupted his peaceful slumber at seven o'clock on the dot.

"Daddy, get up!" she shouted, jumping up and down on his bed, falling over him and hitting him with pillows.

"Whadoyouwan?" Sasuke grumbled. He grunted as Shihu jumped on him.

"Come on, Daddy, it's Tuesday!" Shihu cried. "You always make pancakes on Tuesday!" Sasuke groaned out of irritation, but let the insistent girl pull him up and out of bed. He quickly goaded her out of the room with the promise that he would be right out after he finished dressing. As soon as the door closed, Sasuke collapsed back on the bed. Out of habit, he reached over to the other side of the bed, hoping; or rather, expecting; to feel Naruto's sleepy form under his hand, but, instead feeling nothing. His head snapped over to the empty bedside, eyes wide in alarm. And then he realized. _That's right. He's dead._

His stomach flipped and flopped and for a moment, Sasuke thought he might need another trip to the bathroom. But his stomach settled and he was able to begrudgingly and mournfully begin to dress himself. As he selected a shirt to wear, he thought about what he was going to do that day. Go to work? No, Shihu wasn't going to be going to school and Sasuke didn't want to pay a babysitter when he didn't have to. Going to the bar was out of the question as it tended to get him drunk, thereby increasing the unexpectedness of his actions. Staying home would just tempt him even more to go to the bar, so the only viable option was to take Shihu on a non-alcoholic outing.

Once Sasuke had adorned a casual black t-shirt and a pair of blue jeans he went downstairs to the kitchen, attempting to rub the sleep out of his eyes so that he would at least appear awake to his overly excited daughter. That trait, he knew she acquired from Naruto.

"Alright, so you want pancakes, eh?" Sasuke asked, still feeling rather hung over. Shihu nodded excitedly, licking her lips as she had seen so many of her favorite cartoon characters do on the shows she loved so much.

"With blueberries!" she added. Sasuke chuckled.

"Blueberries it is," he said. Gathering all the necessary ingredients and utensils, Sasuke began his and Shihu's breakfast.

"Shihu, honey what do you think about going out today?" he asked. "We could maybe go the mall or to the bookstore, or…even, get some ice cream…" He smiled a satisfied smile as he heard the enthusiastic squeal of agreement.

"Yes, yes, yes!" she shouted. "Let's get ice cream!" Sasuke smiled and turned around, folding his arms in mock authority.

"Alright," he said. "But only if you eat every single pancake I give you." Shihu nodded and grinned, ready. She looked too much like Naruto when she did that, and Sasuke had to turn away. He quickly regained composure, though, and luckily, Shihu was too young to notice his moment of weakness. He finished the special blueberry pancakes and served three of them to the young blonde girl. She had also acquired Naruto's appetite. She ate swiftly and _skillfully_, if that could be applied to eating. Not a single drop of syrup escaped her fork, not a single bit of butter smeared her mouth. She was truly a very clean, but fast eater. Like Naruto. It surprised Sasuke how much he saw of Naruto in Shihu.

When she finished he told her to get ready and she bolted off to find her shoes.

She returned quickly, her small pink clogs on her tiny feet and Sasuke led her to the car. He helped her into the back, making sure that she buckled her seat belt, before heading to the driver seat. He got in the car, started the engine and backed out into the road.

"Alright, Shihu, where do you want to go?" Sasuke asked. Shihu didn't hesitate.

"I want to get ice cream!" she said, excited. Sasuke laughed.

"After lunch we can," he said. "Besides, you just had breakfast." Shihu folded her arms in an over-the-top pout. Sasuke smiled.

"How about the mall?" the Uchiha asked. "We can browse around until you find a shop you like the looks of." Shihu came out of her feigned pout and nodded eagerly.

"Okay!" she agreed. Sasuke drove to the mall, his sorrow and grief still weighing him down, but the prospect of making Shihu happy lifting him up.

They arrived at the mall in what Shihu complained was too long, and then Sasuke was pulled through the parking lot to the entrance. He stopped her before they went in and told her to behave herself and to hold his hand the whole time so she wouldn't get lost. Shihu nodded hastily, eager to get into the mall.

He let her pull him in and walk him around to the different stores.

"Daddy, look I want to go to the toy store first!" she announced. Sasuke looked in the direction she was pointing and shrugged.

"Alright, Shihu," he said. "But remember we're only looking. I can't afford to buy you everything you see that you like." Shihu nodded, not quite listening to what Sasuke was saying. They walked into the store and Sasuke gave Shihu a bit of leeway, allowing her to stray from his side, though not from his sight, as long as she remained in the store. The little girl immediately ravaged the store. Figuratively, of course. She touched at least one toy in every section and exclaimed that she wanted each one for Christmas. Sasuke watched her with a smile, feeling for once like a normal parent, until one of the staff told him to calm his daughter or leave. Sasuke rolled his eyes, flipped the person off in his mind and went to collect Shihu.

"But Daddy, I want to stay!" Shihu whined. Sasuke smiled.

"Alright," he said. "But it's either this or ice cream." Shihu pouted.

"You're mean," she said, hardly able to hide a very distinct grin. Sasuke returned the smirk.

"That may be," he said. "But you still have to listen to me. Now is it this or ice cream?" Shihu huffed.

"Ice cream," she said. Sasuke chuckled.

"Come on now," he urged. "I'll get you any flavor you want." Shihu's look brightened.

"Okay, let's go!" she said. Sasuke shook his head.

"After lunch, remember?" he said. "Come on, I'll let you pick the next store." Shihu huffed but quickly pulled Sasuke out of the toy store, visions of dangerous prank items and gag gifts flashing through her mind. She was truly Naruto's child.

Sasuke and his daughter spent the morning running around to different shops and stores that Shihu just had to see, and Sasuke had to admit he had a good time. Shihu, for lunch picked out a very familiar family restaurant.

"Two?" a woman asked from behind a counter. Sasuke nodded and she led him and Shihu to a small booth towards the back of the restaurant and placed two menus on the table. Shihu sat down excitedly, simply bubbling with energy, while Sasuke, naturally much more composed, sat down in a quieter fashion. He picked up the menu and began perusing over the meals and prices. Shihu looked at him suddenly.

"Daddy?" she asked, her voice unusually timid. Sasuke looked up.

"Yes?" he asked. Shihu looked seriously at him.

"Aren't you sad that Father's dead?" she inquired. Sasuke jerked as though she had hit him, and almost dropped his menu. Did she seriously think that Sasuke was unaffected by the death of his partner?

"W-why would you ask that?" he rasped. Shihu looked down.

"You're not crying," she said. "I thought that people cried when they were sad." Sasuke looked at his daughter and smiled sadly at her, leaving his seat to go sit next to her. He put an arm comfortingly around her and leaned down close to her. She snuggled into him.

"Do you cry, Shihu?" he asked softly, the soft whisper in his tone calming her. She nodded.

"Every night," she replied, on the verge of tears. Sasuke's hold on her tightened.

"Crying isn't the only way someone can show that they're sad," he said. Shihu looked up at him, intrigued.

"What other ways are there?" she asked incredulously. Sasuke looked forward blankly for a moment. _Drinking._ He would've said.

"Nightmares," he said instead. Shihu's eyes widened.

"Do you have nightmares, Daddy?" she asked. Sasuke nodded. _All the time._ He would've said.

"Sometimes," he said instead. Shihu smiled at him.

"Would you feel better if I sang to you before you went to bed?" she asked. Sasuke nodded. _No._ He would've said.

"Maybe," he said instead. Shihu giggled and hugged him and he internally winced for lying to her so readily. He really was a horrible person.

He sat in hidden sadness for the rest of their meal and was still deep in thought as Shihu selected her ice cream. She happily licked at it and snapped Sasuke back to reality when she insisted that he try a bit.

"It's really good, Daddy, you'll love it!" she promised, holding the slightly dripping cone out to him. Sasuke quickly leaned over and licked away some of the drips threatening to fall. He smiled.

"Delicious, Shihu," he agreed. "You make sure you don't waste it, okay?" Shihu nodded and eagerly resumed her ice cream-licking.

Now, Sasuke had a brother, an older brother, to whom he was very close. This brother of his had a very severe addiction to cigarettes. It was beginning to take a toll on his health. After much persuasion from Sasuke, this brother, Uchiha Itachi, was able to quit smoking. Though it was difficult. And he needed nicotine patches to help him quit completely. And Sasuke, being as close to his brother as he was, offered to get these nicotine patches for Itachi.

And that was what Sasuke needed to do that day. He was a little reluctant about taking Shihu with him into the unpredictable area that housed the drug store, but he did want to buy the patches and get them to Itachi as soon as possible.

"Shihu, finish up," Sasuke said. "We have to get Itachi's patches." Shihu looked up at him.

"His healing patches?" she asked. Sasuke nodded, a slight feeling of guilt prickling at his conscience. He quickly shoved it aside, assuring himself that he wasn't lying to her. They would heal Itachi if he continued to wear them. It was just a different name for them.

Shihu finished her ice cream and went to the bathroom to wash her hands. As soon as she finished, Sasuke took her hand and led her to the car. Soon, they were on their way to the downtown area of their hometown; a sufficiently unruly place with a rather bad reputation. Sasuke grew wary as soon as the buildings that rushed past slowly started to change. Soon they were passing old houses that were too close together, Sasuke thought, as well as groups of teenagers doing something that looked horribly like drug dealing. Sasuke eyed them warily before turning his eyes forward to concentrate on the road.

Soon, they arrived at a small drug store a little ways off the main road and slightly hidden by another building. Sasuke turned into the currently vacant lot and parked the car as close to the store as possible. He quickly made sure that all of the windows were closed before getting out of the car, getting Shihu out and locking the doors. He held her hand firmly and protectively. Hell would freeze over before he let anything happen to his little Shihu.

They walked into the store, hearing the little bell chime as they opened the door. Sasuke waved to the smiling clerk behind the counter and went to collect the nicotine patches. They were where they always had been; back isle, right on the middle shelf. Sasuke paid for them quickly and then hurried back to the car, Shihu in tow. However, he did not reach his car as smoothly as he had hoped.

Standing around the blue vehicle were four boys; all wearing baggy pants that were worn, Sasuke swore, half way down the boys' legs. They were all wearing very intimidating looking jackets, some leather, some not, and a few of them wore hats with the brim at the back. They smirked as Sasuke approached.

"Nice looking kid you got there," one snickered, nodding at Shihu. The little blonde girl hid behind Sasuke's legs, frightened. Sasuke looked at the offending party angrily.

"Thank you," he said edgily. "I take pride in my child." Another of the teenagers smirked.

"Well, if you want her to be alive so you can take pride in her, then you should--"

"What?" Sasuke challenged. "Give you all of my money, get down on my knees and beg for mercy?" The boy grinned.

"Something like that," he said. Sasuke looked at him. If looks could kill. His eyes now flashed a dangerous red and he stood inhumanly still. One could say it was almost like watching a tiger waiting to dispose of offending animals trying to steal her young. The teenagers started to advance on him. His arm wound around Shihu, holding her quivering petrified form close. One of the adolescents flipped the hem of his shirt up in a would-be casual way to reveal a gun. Sasuke eyed it carefully. The boys were still moving closer to him and one of them said something, though Sasuke couldn't hear what. His heart was pounding in his ears and his eyes were on the waistband of the boy with the gun. How many of the others had guns? The Uchiha was at an obvious disadvantage in many ways. Taking the hand that wasn't on Shihu, he reached into his pocket slowly. The boy's hand flashed to his gun and he stopped moving. The ghost of a smirk flashed over Sasuke's face.

"First time with a gun?" he teased, his voice hypnotizing. The boy hesitated. Sasuke pressed further.

"There are so many things that can go wrong," he said, his tone lower and smoother. The boy's hand clenched on the gun. Sasuke watched for an opening.

"Watch it, man, he's trying to trick you!" one of the boys said, his voice laden with a heavy accent. The boy with the gun turned to face him, irritated.

"I know!" he shouted. Sasuke pounced. Picking Shihu up with his left arm, he charged at the teen with the gun. His right fist flew at him and connected with the boy's face. He twisted around in the air and fell, his hands whipping out instinctively to break the fall. Sasuke bolted for the driver seat. Whipping out his keys as another boy charged at him, Sasuke turned and kneed the attacking teen in the stomach, before kicking him away and unlocking his car. He ripped open the door as the others fell down on him. He wrenched it shut and shoved the key in the ignition, turning roughly. The car engine revved to life.

"Get down!" Sasuke shouted to Shihu, the girl still clinging to his neck. She complied and Sasuke quickly put the car in reverse, ducking down instinctively as he heard gun shots and slammed down on the gas. The car jerked backwards and the Uchiha heard the angry yelps of the adolescents as they hurried out of the way. Sasuke deftly changed the car from reverse to drive and sped off out onto the main road. The teenagers stared angrily after him, shouting at each other, the one with the accent positively shrieking in a foreign language.

Sasuke drove as fast as he dared down the street, panting, and with Shihu still clinging to him, still staying as low as possible and shaking like mad. Sasuke wondered as he drove if he could ever go back to that part of the neighborhood again without having to deal with those bastards. He sure as hell would never allow Shihu to go there ever again.

Luckily for him, the clerk in the store had witnessed the whole incident and had called the cops while it was taking place. They had arrived and arrested the boys just moments after Sasuke drove off.

Sasuke pulled the car gracelessly into his driveway and jerked it to a stop. He ripped the keys from the ignition and wrenched the door open. Grabbing Shihu tightly, he went into the house and slammed the door, locking it behind him. Still breathing heavily, he placed Shihu on the floor and knelt down in front of her, his hands on her shoulders.

"Shihu, are you alright?" he asked urgently. The girl nodded and her lower lip quivered.

"Daddy!" she screamed, falling into him and tightly wrapping her arms around him. "They tried to hurt you!" Sasuke picked up Shihu and held her tightly, never wanting to let go.

"I know," he whispered. "But, I promise you we won't have to worry about them ever again." Shihu pulled away from him and wiped the tears from her eyes.

"Pinky promise?" she asked, holding out her pinky. Sasuke nodded, trying to smile.

"Pinky promise," he agreed, hooking his pinky finger with hers.

Shihu managed a shaky smile and Sasuke took her to the couch. She sat on his lap and he grabbed the TV remote, flipping it on. He flipped through the channels, trying desperately to find some news of what happened. He knew it was still much too early for the media to have gotten a hold of that story, if that's what it could be called, but he couldn't be at ease until he knew that he and Shihu were going to be safe.

Finally, after looking through virtually every channel on their TV, Sasuke shut it off and leaned back on the couch, sighing heavily.

"Shihu, do you want to sleep in my bed tonight?" he asked. The blonde girl nodded against him. Sasuke smiled.

"Good," he said. It was still much too early for them to be even thinking about going to sleep, but there was nothing else for them to do.

"Shihu, I think a nap is in order," Sasuke said. Shihu looked up at him, defiance and fear in her eyes. The Uchiha smiled.

"Don't worry, I'm taking one too," he assured her. "We'll nap together, okay?" Shihu smiled and nodded. Without another word, Sasuke picked the girl up and took her upstairs to his and Naruto's room. She stopped him before he could go in, though.

"Daddy, I thought only Father could sleep in that bed with you," she said nervously. Sasuke looked at her and found he couldn't smile anymore.

"No, Shihu," he said. "Now that Father's gone, you can sleep in that bed with me." Shihu nodded, but her face remained nervous and sad. Sasuke approached the bed that was still mussed and unmade and carefully placed Shihu down where Naruto used to sleep, but then changed his mind and placed her where he normally slept. Slowly, the Uchiha went to get under the covers on Naruto's side. Once he was lying next to Shihu, the raven buried his head in the pillow that smelt of Naruto. Tears stung at his eyes as he breathed in his lover's scent. Shihu watched him sadly, for some reason, understanding what he was doing. It was odd and she didn't know how she knew, but she knew. And she knew that he didn't want to be bothered. She turned to face away from her grieving father and tried to fall asleep.

Sasuke, sometime, he didn't know exactly when, within the next hour had fallen asleep. Shihu had fallen asleep a little before him.

When he woke, Sasuke's mind was slightly clearer than it had been. He lay on the bed, thinking, Naruto's pillow clutched to his chest. He considered for the first time if Naruto were still alive. Would that have happened? Shihu would've gone to school that day. So they wouldn't have gone to the mall, so she wouldn't have gone with him to get the patches. But would Sasuke have gone to get the patches anyway? And if he had, would Naruto have come with him? And if he had, would he have been killed by a bullet instead of a disease? What-ifs filled Sasuke's mind to the point where he developed a brutal headache. He groaned in his sleep slightly and rolled out of bed. He trudged down the stairs as quietly as he cared and went to the bathroom to get an aspirin. After he swallowed two of the little tablets, the Uchiha caught his reflection in the mirror. He looked tired. He had small bags under his eyes despite the fact that he had just woken from a nap. His face was pale and hair was wild and mussed. He slumped slightly and his mouth was fixed in a melancholy frown that he knew would never go away.

Sasuke sighed and turned away from the mirror. He didn't care about his appearance anymore. He didn't care about a lot of things anymore. It was just too much effort without Naruto.

The days slowly passed and Sasuke still missed Naruto. Shihu still missed Father. The boys who had attacked Sasuke and Shihu had been arrested and jailed. Sasuke still had nightmares. He still went out drinking. He still came home drunk.

But something new happened and kept happening more and more often. Sasuke yelled at Shihu.

* * *

**Oooh, poor Sasuke. He's drunk all the time! Poor Shihu. She's getting yelled at all the time!**

**Where the hell is Neji?? He'd better get here soon! ;D**

**Review please and tell me if I need to change anything!**


	4. I Hate You!

It happened about one week after the incident at the drug store. Sasuke came home drunk, of course and Shihu made one comment too many. Sasuke lost it. No physical violence was involved, thankfully, but he ranted and raged for quite a bit, until Shihu scurried off to her room, crying, insignificant and scared. Before she disappeared from sight she cried out the words Sasuke never wanted to hear from her.

"I hate you..!"

Those words hit Sasuke hard. It was like the ice cold punch of diving into freezing water. No. Worse. Much worse.

Once again the guilt stabbed at Sasuke; stung him and burned at him like the fire that could never be doused. He had immediately regretted his words, but could never take them back. And he couldn't approach Shihu either. He could only sink to his knees, self loathing taking over him as he resented his actions and wished that he could just once make Shihu feel as though she was the one thing right in his life, instead of the wrong one.

In his remorse, he let his head fall to his hands and whispered desperately, "I'm so sorry, Shihu..! Please, forgive me…" But of course she couldn't hear him. She could only hear the sounds of her incandescent sobbing. She could only hear her father's angry words.

"Useless…Annoying…Wish Naruto was here to deal with you…" Shihu crushed her face against her pillow as long as she dared before she pulled away to breath. Had she been any older she might've chosen that smothering to end her suffering. But she was just a child. She didn't suffer from complex thoughts that those older than her did. She was hanging on by a thread of innocence and hope. She clung to the hope that perhaps she could be the one to end her father's suffering. She could be the one to make him smile warmly at her again. And at others. That maybe, just maybe, she could be the one to make him happy.

Unfortunately for both Shihu and Sasuke, this was not the last time Sasuke's drunkenness caused him to do something rash.

Alcohol, as is obvious, is a dangerous thing, and even more dangerous than that is the addiction to it one can have. Such was true with Sasuke. The Uchiha slowly slipped into a maddening state of depression and attempted still to deal with his feelings via alcohol. He would go to the bar and come home drunk and then Shihu would flee to her room. Sasuke wouldn't object. He would just stumble and trip over to the couch and let himself flop heavily down on it, waiting for the alcohol and pain to pass.

His friends worried about him and worried for him. But they took no action until Sasuke had had one too many beers and it seriously affected his behavior. They didn't do anything until Sasuke started a bar fight.

It had started as nothing serious. Just a few men throwing comments back and forth. But one man went too far.

Sasuke had just made a rather rude comment regarding the weight of a very stocky and rather plump man. The man, angry and drunk, had then retorted with a comment that insinuated Sasuke as gay, having no knowledge of course that the Uchiha indeed was so. Without going into details, I shall say only that one word in particular angered Sasuke beyond the point of restraint.

Growling like a beast, Sasuke ran at the man, bringing his clenched fist back and letting it fly. It connected hard with the man's round face and he went twisting to the ground, beer and spit flying from his mouth. The sound of shattering glass rang through the now silent bar as the man went crashing into the table. Sasuke stood above him, fists clenched, teeth bared, breath coming out angrily and loudly. The man glared angrily at Sasuke, eyes wide, face slowly contorting with rage. He stood up and started at Sasuke, winding back his fist. He let it fly, but Sasuke, being the more agile and less overweight one, easily moved to the side and landed another punch on the man. It was at this time that Kiba decided it best to intervene. He jumped into the fray along with Shikamaru, who also worked there at the time, and wrenched Sasuke away from the other, while Shikamaru grabbed the portly man and, with the help of some of the man's companions, managed to calm him down. He still glared daggers at Sasuke however. The Uchiha still fought to get to him, and Kiba was having trouble restraining him. He yelled for Shikamaru to help him and the Nara quickly hurried over to Sasuke, grabbing him and pushing him back, while Kiba pulled. The other man still glowered but was now tenderly feeling at the bruise that Sasuke's punch had given him.

"Sasuke, man calm down!" Kiba shouted through gritted teeth. Sasuke snarled and growled in reply, animosity taking over him. Shikamaru struggled to get him to sit down.

"Man!" he said, panting. "When will this guy ever cool it!?" He would've muttered 'troublesome' but Sasuke chose that moment to kick the Nara, sending the ebon haired boy off him, yelping in surprise. Kiba's eyes widened and he ducked away from Sasuke's oncoming fist, letting go of the raven in the process. The Uchiha, now free from all restraint, ran at the portly man once again. The man, this time, was ready and managed to avoid the punch, though only barely and got a good hit in himself before he was, once again, restrained. Sasuke stumbled back, blood running, though not flowing, from a cut on his lip. He glared and ferocity drove him in again. Somehow the man managed to break free form his captors as well and the fight resumed. Then Kiba called the cops.

Fifteen minutes later, three policemen barged through the door and separated Sasuke and the man. The latter sported a very large bruise on his cheek and blood was still coming from his lip. His eye was slowly blackening and he glared angrily at the former, who had a larger amount of blood falling from a larger cut, this one on his cheek and his eye was swollen shut. With his open eye he glared right back.

"Alright, what the hell happened here!?" one of the policemen barked. Sasuke glared at him but didn't answer. Kiba spoke up.

"Something just got a little out of hands," he said. "We just needed to separate those two." The cop looked at him and nodded.

"Who started it?" another asked. Shikamaru and Kiba looked hesitant. Of course, everyone who had witnessed the starting of the fight knew that it was Sasuke who initiated it, but he was their friend and they didn't want to get him in trouble. The other man spoke up instantly though.

"He did," he said, pointing a rather red finger at Sasuke. The police looked to the men behind him.

"Is that true?" he asked. They all nodded. The cop turned to Shikamaru and Kiba, expecting them to answer. They were both silent. He raised a brow.

"Is that true?" he repeated. Kiba opened his mouth to speak but closed it again. Shikamaru turned to the man with whom Sasuke had been fighting.

"It was provoked," he said, trying not to mar the truth, while at the same time, trying to pin some of the blame on the man whom Sasuke had attacked. "He made a crude comment that would've made anyone fly off the handle." The police raised his other eyebrow.

"So you admit that this man here started the fight?" he asked, indicating to Sasuke. Shikamaru shook his head, deciding to reveal some of his witty brilliance.

"Nope, it was definitely that other guy," he said. "He was the one who started the fight when he started throwing insults around, but Sasuke did throw the first punch." The police nodded.

"Thank you," he said. "That's all I needed to hear." He started to turn, but Shikamaru stopped him.

"Hold up a second there, chief," he said. The policeman stopped and turned, trying to hide his annoyance.

"Yes?" he said. Shikamaru smirked at him.

"If you're going to fine anyone, fine this bastard here," he said, pointing a lazy thumb at the plump man with the bruise. He glared at Shikamaru. The Nara continued.

"I mean he's been saying all sorts of rude things to everyone. We were about to kick him out. Sasuke just did what everyone else wanted to do," he said. The cop arched a brow.

"I find that hard to believe," he said. "Are you sure you're not just protecting your friend because he's just that; a friend?" Shikamaru chuckled.

"Maybe I am," he said. "Maybe I'm not. Maybe those guys over there are just sticking up for this fat bastard because they're his friends. You never can tell, can you?" He grinned at the policeman's obvious annoyance and frustration. The portly man glared at Shikamaru but didn't dare do anything more in the presence of police officers. The police officer to whom Shikamaru had been talking started to twitch slightly.

"I'm warning you," he threatened. "Don't try my patience. It's wearing thin." Shikamaru chuckled, shaking his head.

"I would never dream of it, chief," he said. The cop glared at him and started over.

"Well, you're getting me pretty close to my patience's end," he growled. Shikamaru looked him square in the eye.

"Makes you kinda want to hit me, doesn't it?" he challenged. The police officer opened his mouth but froze, realizing for the first time what the Nara had been doing; reenacting the situation in which Sasuke had been minutes ago. Proving that the power of provocation could make even the most levelheaded of people lose control. And he had fallen for it. Easily. And it made him very angry, and he wanted very much to hit Shikamaru. But the Nara was right. And he knew it.

Scowling, he told his other police companions to let the men off with a warning. Still glaring at Shikamaru, the police left and Kiba and the Nara proceeded to throw the plump man and his companions out of the bar.

"Hey, but he hit me!" the man shouted angrily. Shikamaru smirked and shrugged.

"But he has friends who work at the bar," he shot. "And you don't. So move the hell along." The man scowled and opened his mouth but refrained from speaking as Shikamaru, Kiba and Sasuke chose that moment to send him a death glare. The man reluctantly turned and left, flanked by his rather stunned companions.

Shikamaru turned to Kiba and Sasuke.

"Man, that was troublesome," he groaned. Kiba nodded and turned to Sasuke.

"Sasuke, what were you thinking!?" he shouted. He stopped himself from saying anymore, remembering that Sasuke was drunk. The intoxicated Uchiha tried to speak, but only a garbled mess of words came out. Shikamaru and Kiba quickly grabbed his arms as he sagged and placed him carefully down in a chair, watching his head loll over onto his shoulder. The Inuzuka and the Nara watched him nervously. The Uchiha's eyes were still flashing red slightly and he was still mumbling angry words at the plump man who was no longer there. The two exchanged nervous looks and then tried once again to talk to Sasuke.

"Hey, Sasuke, I think you should stay here for a while," Kiba said. "I mean at least until you're sober." Shikamaru nodded his agreement. Sasuke looked at Kiba and his eyes were glazed over from the effects of the alcohol and he opened his mouth widely and shouted, "'Mno'drunk!" Shikamaru blinked and shook his head. Beside him, Kiba sighed.

"Completely hammered," Shikamaru muttered.

"One hundred percent out of it," Kiba agreed. Sasuke looked around stupidly, his level of intelligence at an all time zero and his reaction time and reflexes even lower. He tried to stand but forgot to use his legs and fell over clumsily. Kiba and Shikamaru quickly grabbed him and pulled him to his feet. He shoved them off and stumbled and tripped his way to the door. He reached out to grab the handle and instead closed his hand down on air a foot in front of it. He leaned forward as though pushing a door open and fell completely, hitting his head on the actual door before he once again became acquainted with the floor. It was a pitiful display. Shikamaru and Kiba once again tried to settle Sasuke down, but the impatient, impossibly drunk Uchiha kept trying to leave.

Finally, when the raven fell over a table, bringing it down with him, making a loud crash that resonated through the bar, the manager of the bar came out in a rage and demanded to know what the hell was going on. His eyes moved from an embarrassed Kiba to a nervous Shikamaru to an intoxicated Sasuke. His eyes became suddenly knowing. He turned to Kiba and Shikamaru and was stern.

"Get him out of here," he ordered. Both Shikamaru and Kiba had been expecting this but had hoped that it wouldn't be coming. They both looked pleadingly at the manager.

"Please, sir can we just let him stay the night until he's sober?" Kiba asked imploringly. The angry man shook his head.

"Out of the question," he said. "I don't want to get any more bad business and that's exactly what he's bringing. I'm going to go into the back and when I get back he'd better be gone. You can take him home, but that's it." He gave one last commanding look before turning and marching back through a door marked, 'Employees Only.' Shikamaru watched him in annoyance and Kiba watched him angrily.

"Bastard," he snarled quietly. "Sometimes I wonder why the hell I work for him." Shikamaru snickered.

"For money," he said glumly. Kiba sighed dejectedly, knowing that the ebon haired Nara was right. He turned to Sasuke, now sitting on his knees, his shoulders slumped, his head hanging limply forward. The Inuzuka kneeled and picked Sasuke up, forcing the Uchiha's arm around his shoulder. Sasuke swayed and felt his stomach lurch as his weight was shifted onto Kiba. Shikamaru hurried to open the door as Kiba walked slowly with Sasuke leaning heavily on him, not helping much at all.

"Alright, you know where Sasuke lives, right?" Shikamaru asked. Kiba nodded.

"Yeah," he confirmed. "I drove him to his house the last time he was too drunk to drive." Shikamaru quickly reached into Sasuke's pant pocket, ignoring the jumbled protests coming from the Uchiha.

"Good," he said, extracting a pair of car keys from the pocket and unlocking Sasuke's deep blue Honda. "So you can drive and I'll sit in the back with Sasuke." Kiba nodded and got into the driver seat. Shikamaru opened the door in the back and tried very hard to persuade a struggling Sasuke into the back seat.

"No!" Sasuke cried. "I don'wanna!" The Nara made a noise of frustration as he finally got the Uchiha into the car. Immediately upon being forced into the car, Sasuke slid over as far from Shikamaru as possible and went into a pout. A drunken one of course. The Nara slid in after him, muttering a small, "Troublesome" as he did so.

Kiba started the car and put it in reverse. He began to back out of the parking lot and Sasuke fell forward, hitting his head on the seat in front of him. Shikamaru hastily grabbed him and pulled him back so he sat upright. Kiba put the car in drive and accelerated, causing Sasuke to fall back against the seat. Shikamaru watched Sasuke carefully and Kiba kept glancing in the rearview mirror to make sure the both of them were okay. Sasuke was staring blankly forward at the back of the driver seat and mumbling to himself.

"Do you think he'll be alright?" Kiba asked, his eyes darting once again to the mirror before him. Shikamaru shrugged.

"Can't say right now," he said. "If he keeps drinking, he might just kill himself. And he's gotten to the point where I think he might want to kill himself." Kiba shuddered.

"Well, he sure as hell isn't going to be allowed back at the bar," he observed. "By the way, nice stunt you pulled back there, 'chief.'" The Inuzuka smirked and the Nara returned the grin, turning to face him.

"Heh," he chuckled. "Who knew a policeman couldn't handle a simple smartass." Kiba laughed.

"Well, you made smartass comments that were hard to handle," he said. "I don't blame him. But I don't think he's gonna be all that excited to help you again." Shikamaru shrugged.

"Ah, well, who needs him?" he smirked. "Am I right?" Kiba grinned.

"Can't argue with that," he replied. He made a very sharp turn and Sasuke grunted, falling sideways. Shikamaru quickly caught him and pulled him upright.

"We're almost there, Sasuke," he said softly. "Hang in there, man." Sasuke looked at him.

"Naruto!" he cried, flinging his arms around Shikamaru's neck.

"What the fu-" Shikamaru pulled Sasuke's arms off of him and pushed the man away, just as Kiba turned into the Uchiha's driveway. Kiba pulled up to the garage and stopped the car. He quickly took the key out and opened the door for Shikamaru.

"Damn! He's really out of it!" Shikamaru observed, pulling a very confused Sasuke out of the car. "He's never mistaken anyone for Naruto. And I thought I looked as far from that little blonde as possible." Kiba chuckled.

"Yeah, well," he said. "That's what happens when you have as much alcohol in your body as you do water. He's gonna need to sleep for at least two days to get rid of all the alcohol he has in him." Shikamaru nodded and Sasuke pulled himself from the Nara's grasp, hurrying into his house.

He fell on the door, grabbing the knob to hold himself up. Turning it roughly to the right, Sasuke pushed and the door swung open, taking the Uchiha with it. He made a noise and Tsukiko hurried out into the living room, followed closely by Shihu. The girl's eyes widened when they saw the drunk state her father was in.

"Naruto?" Sasuke called into the house, his tone slurred. No answer was given and Tsukiko, rather frightened by this sudden display of drunkenness, stood frozen in the doorway to the kitchen. Shihu, however, ran to her father.

"Daddy!" she cried. Sasuke's head turned unsteadily to face her. His eyes showed puzzlement.

"Wha?" he managed. "Who th'hell are you?" Shihu looked at him questioningly.

"Daddy, that's not funny," she said, her voice quivering slightly. Sasuke scoffed.

"'Snot a joke," he gurgled. "Get th'ell away fromme." He tried to stumble away from her, but she grabbed his arm and tried to stop him.

"Daddy, are you okay?" Shihu asked urgently. "Why are you acting so mean?" She tired to pull him around to face her but the Uchiha angrily wrenched his arm from her grasp. He turned to face her, growling.

"Lea'me alone!" he shouted. "Fuck off." Shihu looked as though she was about to cry. Confused and perplexed, she reached out once again to Sasuke, but the raven, being drunk out of his mind and not realizing anything outside of who he himself was, lost his temper. He turned to her and flung his fist at her face. There was a loud clap and a cry as Shihu was sent spinning off her feet and onto the floor a few feet away from Sasuke. There was a silence in the house. Shikamaru and Kiba stared at Sasuke and Tsukiko jerked as though she too had been struck.

Tsukiko was the first to come out of her daze. Shrieking, she ran to the fallen girl and pulled her into her arms. Shihu looked at Sasuke through Tsukiko's arms and whimpered. Shikamaru and Kiba ran at Sasuke, grabbing his arms and pulling him away from Shihu and Tsukiko. The babysitter quickly shot up and bolted from the room, taking the blonde girl with her.

Shikamaru and Kiba stared wide-eyed at Sasuke.

"Sasuke, what the hell was that for!?" Kiba shouted. Shikamaru leaned forward.

"You know that you just seriously hurt your own daughter, right!?" he asked, his voice rising dangerously. Sasuke just looked at him. He leaned forward, opened his mouth as though to speak, but vomited. The Nara and the Inuzuka instinctively jumped back, just barely avoiding the bitter vomit that came from the Uchiha's mouth. Sasuke pulled himself back up and leaned back on the couch, some vomit still on his mouth. Kiba looked to Shikamaru and the other sighed.

"I'll clean this up, I guess," he said. "You take the barfing guy to the bathroom. Not through the kitchen, though." Kiba nodded and quickly stood up, pulling Sasuke with him. Carefully positioning himself behind the Uchiha for obvious reasons, the Inuzuka slowly walked the raven to the bathroom, careful, as Shikamaru said, to avoid the kitchen.

In the kitchen, Tsukiko had the phone clasped between her ear and shoulder and was using her hands to treat Shihu's bruise. The girl was crying indiscernible words and trying not to move while the babysitter gently fingered the bruise and placed a small bandage over it.

"Yes, I'd like to report a case of child abuse!" Tsukiko yelled into the phone, her voice slightly hysterical. Her breathing was heavy and her mind was still filled with visions of Sasuke striking Shihu.

"Well, he only hit her once just now," she admitted sheepishly to a question unheard by all except her. "But it was more than a hit, it was a punch! And she's been getting yelled at by him, too! He gets drunk all the time now and doesn't bother to wait it out before he comes home! It could happen again! It—" She was stopped and she sat down, her hand clasping at her chest, to try and still her still rapidly beating heart.

"Her father," she clarified, taking calm deep breaths on the advice of her conversation partner. "He just lost his partner, so I don't blame him for drinking, bu-but he comes home and he barely recognizes who I am! Or who Shihu is!" She was silent for a moment before speaking once more into the phone.

"His babysitter," she answered. "And Shihu's his daughter." She was silent once more and then stood up, cupping Shihu's chin and placing a small kiss on the girl's head before heading out into the living room. She stopped at the sight of the vomit, which was partially cleaned by Shikamaru, and made a face. She took a step forward and then paused, speaking once again to the phone.

"I don't know anything of what happened tonight except that he hit her," Tsukiko admitted. Shikamaru looked up and arched a brow. The babysitter continued.

"Yeah, some of his friends were there. Yeah, I'll put one of them on. Hold on." She quickly approached Shikamaru and put a hand over the phone receiver. The Nara looked at her with an expression bordering shock on his face.

"You're reporting this as child abuse!?" he asked incredulously, his voice a loud whisper. Tsukiko looked apologetic but determined.

"I'm sorry but I didn't know what else to do!" she said in a desperate whisper. "I just saw him hit her like that and my mind sort of skipped. I did the first thing that I thought of!" Shikamaru sighed and looked down, pinching the bridge of his nose. He knew that Tsukiko was going to put him on since Kiba was in the bathroom with Sasuke, and he knew that he had to tell the truth. But that may result in Sasuke losing Shihu, and that would kill the Uchiha, no matter how many times he hit or yelled at her.

But what if it did happen again? What if this was the beginning of Sasuke's life as an alcoholic and he was just going to keep coming home and hurting Shihu. That would be no better.

Shikamaru sighed and took the phone Tsukiko was holding out to him. He stood up and Tsukiko knelt down, finishing the cleaning job Shikamaru had started.

The Nara walked into the kitchen and stopped short at the sight of Shihu, sitting slumped on the counter, her hands sitting limply in her lap, her head forward so her hair covered her face. It was a pitiful sight, and it was what made Shikamaru decide to tell the whole truth. Shihu didn't deserve this. Even he saw that. As much as he wanted to side with Sasuke, he knew that that would only lead to more hurt.

"Yeah, this is his friend," the Nara spoke dejectedly into the phone. "Yeah, he went out to the bar tonight and had too much to drink. Some guy started throwing insults around and said something that made Sasuke go over the top." He stopped and listened to a question for a moment and then nodded his head sheepishly, as though the other could see him.

"Yeah, he sorta punched the guy," he said. "They started getting seriously into the fight and we had to call the authorities." He paused once again and then shook his head.

"No, I work there," he said. "Sasuke is one of my friends but I woulda gone anyway.

"…No, the fight was definitely provoked, but he was…

"Yeah, I figured. No, me and another guy who works there took him home and that's when the babysitter and his daughter ran into the room and he hit his daughter.

"…The cops just let both guys off with a warning.

"…Nothing in the bar was broken or ruined. Just a few overturned tables.

"…Yeah, well, I'd like to stay on topic if you don't mind—

"…Does your job include interrupting people or do you just enjoy doing it?

"…Who's the one being snippy?

"…Couldn't agree more. So, did the babysitter already mention that Sasuke lost his husband?

"…Yes, he's gay. Is that a problem in any way..?

"…Good. So, you understand that this is just a way for him to deal with hiss loss? The drinking, I mean?

"…Oh, yeah I understand that that doesn't in any way justify his actions.

"…I don't know, I didn't drive him here. Here, I'll pass you back to the babysitter, she'll tell you." The Nara scowled as he went to find Tsukiko, now finished with cleaning the vomit and sitting impatiently on the sofa. The bitch on the other end of the phone was just plain _bitchy_. Beyond troublesome and on to the next level.

"Hey, you started this," he grouched to Tsukiko. "So, come here and finish it." She scurried up and hurried over to take the phone from him, almost tripping. She grabbed it out of his hands and quickly hurried back into the kitchen to check on Shihu, talking hastily into the receiver. Shikamaru watched her go and then flopped on the couch. His head fell back and he heaved a deep sigh. _Oh, god, this is too troublesome._ He thought. _Now, if he loses Shihu, I'll be partly responsible. Damn._

A moment later, Kiba emerged from the bathroom and walked into the living room. At seeing Shikamaru, the Inuzuka let himself fall down onto the couch next to him.

"What'd I miss?" he asked. The Nara sighed.

"You sure you wanna know?" he asked flatly. Kiba's brow creased.

"Why, did something else happen?" he asked nervously. Shikamaru nodded.

"Tsukiko called the emergency number and reported this as a child abuse case," he said. "And I kinda told them about the bar fight." Kiba leaned towards the Nara and pulled the man around to face him.

"You what!?" he asked loudly. "Why the hell would you do that!?" Shikamaru looked fiercely back at him.

"Because, Kiba," he started. "What if he comes home drunk again and hits Shihu more? Then what? It's not like it's going to be any better than if he loses Shihu." Kiba sighed resignedly and fell back against the back of the couch.

"No, I know," he said. "I would've done the same thing." The Nara nodded and leaned back against the couch himself. They both were silent. They both thought. What would Sasuke do if he lost Shihu? Had he really done enough to lose her? Who was Shihu's next legally appointed guardian? And so on. It was a very stressful night.

Sasuke suffered a horrible hangover, and came out of it completely unaware of what he had done. His mind was blank and he couldn't remember anything of what happened the previous day. Only that something horrible must've happened. He felt an unusual feeling deep in his gut that told him he was to blame for something. And he wracked his brain over and over to try and figure out what. But nothing came.

And it wasn't until the mail came that day that he realized to some extent what had happened. Mixed in with the bills and letters from his friends inquiring after his health and condition, was one thing that made his heart stop.

A summons to court.

* * *

**Whoa!! Sasuke hit Shihu! And he's going to court! Things don't look too good for him. **

**Neji's coming next chptr! Bear with me, and review! Review! Review!**


	5. Don't Take My Child From Me

Sasuke's stomach overturned at the sight of the official paper in his hands, which soon began to shake. His eyes widened as he read the elegant scrawl that explained to him why he was summoned to court. He had been accused of abusing his child. _Oh, god…_ He thought. _What did I do!?_ He quickly folded the letter and stuffed it into his pocket. He swiftly ran towards the stairs and sprinted up them, taking two at a time and jumping the last three. He bolted down the hall to Shihu's closed door. He tried to open it, but the knob would not turn.

"Shihu!" the Uchiha cried. He heard movement in the room and then heard the creak of bed springs as the girl jumped on her bed. She whimpered. Sasuke winced. He tried again, pounding hard on the door.

"Shihu!" he yelled. "Please come out!" He heard another cry and then heard a soft whisper, just barely audible.

"Don't hit me again!" He stopped his insistent banging and froze. Hit? _Hit?_ He had hit Shihu? He never remembered hitting her. But then again he never remembered anything from that past day.

Slowly, he slid down to his knees and his gaze fell to the ground. He didn't have it in him to beg for her forgiveness anymore. He didn't deserve that. He didn't have it in him to listen to any more of the self loathing comments that rippled through his head anymore. Even though they were true. He didn't have it in him to live. But he didn't have it in him to die. For now, he was stuck in no-man's-land.

The required date specified by the letter was only a few days away. Those days were killing Sasuke. It was most definitely the calm before the storm. He was caught between the idea of losing Shihu and the idea of keeping her. He knew that if he had hit her, then it would most definitely be a close call, but not knowing which was going to be was horrible. And he was tempted now more than ever to drink. But the memory, or lack thereof, of what he had done to Shihu was keeping him from the bar and alcohol in general. He didn't deserve to cope with his guilt. His punishment was knowing and being aware of it all the time.

He did talk with his friends, though. Shikamaru and Kiba in particular, since they had been there when it had happened. When he had hit his daughter. He would express to them how much he didn't want to lose her. How much he wanted to stay her father. And they would listen as good friends do. But they would feel horrible too. Because they hadn't been able to; or rather didn't prevent it. Shikamaru especially, since he had agreed with Tsukiko in her decision to call it a child abuse case. Of course, Sasuke hadn't blamed him and never would. The Uchiha, after all, knew that Shikamaru had only been telling the truth. But that didn't stop the Nara from feeling incredibly guilty.

"Shikamaru, god, I already told you it's not your fault!" Sasuke said exasperatedly. Shikamaru winced and looked away. His eyes moved to gaze at the lazy clouds that floated high above the café that they both sat in. He sighed. He knew Sasuke had already told him it wasn't his fault, but he still felt as though part of it was.

"I know, Sasuke," he said. "But I still can't help how I feel. I think you of all people understand that." He turned to look at Sasuke sadly and the Uchiha nodded. He did know and understand what Shikamaru was talking about. And he felt horrible that anyone other than himself should have to experience it.

Feeling awkward about the tender subject, Sasuke changed the topic of discussion.

"How're things going for you?" he asked, his voice failing to hide a slightly uncomfortable tone. Shikamaru smirked at him, in no way missing what he was trying to do.

"Ah, you know," he said. "The usual, I guess. My mother's as annoying and troublesome as ever. My best friend still eats half the contents of his refrigerator in five minutes and another of my friends is going through the worst time in the world and won't talk about it with me." The Uchiha blinked at Shikamaru's stubbornness and refusal to let the topic go.

"Shikamaru, it's just awkward," Sasuke insisted. "It's not that I won't talk to you—"

"Good, then talk," the Nara cut in. Sasuke glared at him, realizing his own mistake. He sighed.

"You already know how I feel," he said. Shikamaru nodded.

"Yeah," he said simply. "But I don't know what you're going to do about it. I don't think you even know." He looked at Sasuke meaningfully and the Uchiha looked down.

"What can I do?" he asked softly and desperately. "The problem with these people is they don't care about sentiments. This isn't like some clichéd movie. I can't gush about all my feelings and expect them to pity me. That doesn't work here. Not in Konoha." He raised his head and gazed miserably at Shikamaru, who, for once, didn't know what to say. He just looked back at Sasuke, trying to think of something comforting to say, but his mind was blank. The Uchiha smiled sadly at him and got up to leave.

"I'm going home," he said. "The case is tomorrow and Shihu still hasn't forgiven me. I don't want her to give up on me. I'll see you around." He waved halfheartedly at the Nara, who returned the gesture, just as dead. _Damn, Sasuke._ He thought. _You gave up on Shihu long before she gave up on you._

Sasuke walked into his house and found Shihu sitting in the lap of a very beautiful woman with short pink hair and a kind face. Sitting next to her was a very tall man with black hair, a wide smile and very large eyebrows. Upon seeing Sasuke, the woman and the man stood, Shihu, clutched in the woman's arms and casting Sasuke a very frightened look. Sasuke blinked, hiding tears that the woman seemed to sense. She quickly handed the girl off to the man beside her and walked tentatively towards the Uchiha. Smiling she leaned up and placed a comforting kiss on his cheek.

"How are you doing, Sasuke?" she asked, her voice drenched with concern. Sasuke chuckled, in an attempt to lighten the mood. That was Sakura. Always able to see what was wrong.

"Well, I'm better than I was a day ago," he said. Sakura's look didn't change. She turned to the man holding Shihu. He put the girl down and walked her into the kitchen.

"How are you two doing?" the Uchiha asked, gesturing to the door the man had just disappeared through. Sakura smiled.

"Great," she said. "I don't know if you heard, what with everything going on, but, I'm pregnant." Sasuke smiled at her, trying to look and sound sincere.

"Congratulations!" he said, wrapping his arms around her in a kind embrace. Sakura lifted her hands up around the Uchiha and smiled against him. When she pulled away, Sasuke asked, "How long?" Sakura's eyes sparkled.

"One month," she replied. Sasuke nodded, expressing his excitement for her once more, but only feeling half of what he said he did. He remembered the day she had been pregnant with Shihu. He remembered the day Naruto had come home and told him that he and Sasuke were going to be fathers. He remembered the day when he held Sakura's hand as she gave birth to his beautiful Shihu. He remembered. How grateful to the Haruno he had been. Shihu was given life because of her. Sakura had given Sasuke and Naruto a miracle and he had never been able to express his gratitude enough. But now, it was different. Now, she was having the child that she would raise herself. And now, even though he wanted to be happy for her, Sasuke had no Naruto to be happy with.

_And what's more._ Sasuke thought. _She may end up being the one who continues to raise Shihu._ He shuddered and brushed the thought from his mind. Turning back to the pink haired Haruno, the Uchiha listened to her recount the past few days in which she and her husband spent hours picking out colors for the nursery, argued over cute baby names and debated about whether it would be a boy or a girl. Sasuke envied her. And her husband. He remembered when he had done just that with Naruto. A millennium ago. And now only a distant memory, slowly getting harder and harder to hold on to.

The Uchiha bit back a sigh and heard Sakura stop talking. She looked at him nervously.

"Ah, gomen, Sasuke," she said quickly. "I shouldn't have…well, I…" She stopped and Sasuke looked reassuringly at her.

"It's alright, Sakura," he said, putting a hand on her shoulder. "You deserve to be happy. You gave Naruto and I something that could've made you as happy as you are now. I'm only sorry I can't share your joy." He looked sadly towards the kitchen and Sakura followed his gaze. Her eyes showed concern and she quickly went into the kitchen, leaving Sasuke out in the living room. She returned a moment later with the man, her husband Lee, from before and urged the Uchiha to go in. Sasuke shook his head vehemently, not wanting to make Shihu uncomfortable, but the Haruno only urged more, accompanied by Lee, who gently pushed Sasuke towards the open door. Reluctantly, albeit hopefully, the raven walked towards his daughter, being careful to keep his distance when he saw her. She flinched as he entered the room and took a step back. Sasuke flinched and fought to keep his eyes open. He knelt down and softly called to her.

"Shihu," he whispered. "Are you…Do you still…" He broke off and he clenched his eyes shut, trying to keep the moisture in his eyes from escaping them. Shihu looked warily at him.

"Daddy," she ventured quietly. "Are you going to hit me again?" Sasuke jerked and looked at her. He wanted to deny that he would. He wanted to shout that he would never bring any harm to her again. But the truth was that he didn't know. He didn't know if he would be able to prevent himself from harming her again. Physically or emotionally. And that realization scared him. And he couldn't take it.

Without answering the question, the Uchiha stood up and bolted out of the kitchen, throwing himself on the couch in front of a bewildered Sakura and a perplexed Lee. He buried his head in the pillow and tried to calm his breathing. He felt a hand on his back and looked up to see Lee and Sakura standing over him, looking worried and concerned. The Uchiha shook his head.

"I can't do it," he said dejectedly. "I can't bring myself to talk to her after what I did." He stopped and looked forward, his eyes reflecting sadness. Lee and Sakura exchanged nervous glances. The former lifted Sasuke up and placed himself next to the distraught raven. Sasuke found himself looking into the kind eyes of Rock Lee and had to bite back tears.

"Sasuke, don't give up!" Lee urged. "You'll be able to stay by Shihu's side no matter what! I promise you this!" He smiled hugely and gave Sasuke the thumbs up. The Uchiha couldn't help but grin and look at Sakura.

"Honestly, Sakura, I don't know what you see in this guy," he said teasingly. Sakura giggled and put her arms around Lee, kissing his cheek and making him blush. Sasuke wanted to look away but didn't. Couldn't. That one action held too many memories. Memories that he didn't wish to forget.

Sighing to himself, the Uchiha's mind was brought over to the next day when he would have to go to court. Could he handle it? Would he be able to keep his cool long enough to present a good case that might end up saving him from loosing Shihu. He certainly hoped so. Sasuke clenched his eyes shut. Oh how he hoped so.

The next day came quickly and soon Sasuke found himself in a button-up white shirt, black pants and black loafers, sitting in a courtroom facing a very grouchy looking judge and flanked by all of his friends and even some people he did not know. The judge had been speaking useless babble for the past few minutes about why they were there, and Sasuke found he didn't quite like the way the judge put it. He found himself scowling at the judge's words and he found it very hard to keep still. And it hadn't even been five minutes.

Finally, the judge said something of worth. Or, at least something that demanded Sasuke's attention.

"Alright, now, we will discuss the matter of Shihu Uzumaki's guardian," he said, looking down at some official file he had before him. Sasuke's eyes fixed themselves upon his cloaked form in apprehension. Was he suggesting that—

"Mr. Uchiha," the judge said smoothly. "If you would please stand." Sasuke complied, standing stiffly and resting his hands on the table before him, his eyes never once leaving the other's. The judge, a man with slight wrinkles forming in his tanned skin, and graying receding hair, looked the Uchiha over. His sharp thick brow arched in a look that only Sasuke recognized as disdain. He quickly glanced at the papers in front of him before returning his calculating gaze to Sasuke.

"Mr. Uchiha, as the father and current guardian of this child, you do realize that a certain level of maturity and love is expected of you, yes?" he asked calmly. Sasuke nodded.

"Yes," he mumbled, barely audible. The judge nodded.

"And you do also understand why you're here, yes?"

"Yes."

"Good. You also know that yours is not a very favorable history in a case such as this. In the past month you have initiated two fights and struck your daughter once. You understand this as well, I presume?" At this Sasuke stared at the judge.

"One," he corrected. The man looked at him.

"Excuse me?" he asked formally. Sasuke looked hard at him.

"One," he repeated. "I only initiated one fight." The judge raised his brow once again.

"Ahem, but that is not so," he replied, his tone changing ever so slightly to reveal a hint of disgust. "As I understand it, you were in a parking lot with your daughter and you attacked four teenage boys who were loitering near your car." Sasuke's eyes widened and his mouth fell open. He didn't believe how someone with such an important job could be so clueless! Hadn't that incident been on the news? Hadn't the clerk witnessed the whole thing and called the police? A thousand angry retorts sped through Sasuke's mind, but before he could speak one of them, a smooth, beautiful baritone voice spoke.

"That is simply unfair." Sasuke whipped around and arched a brow at the strange sight. A man. A very tall elegant man stood in front of his seat across from Sasuke and on the other side of the judge. His long, flowing, coffee-brown hair was tied back neatly and formally, the tie low in the hair, leaving only an inch free from its hold. His skin was a pale alabaster color with a hint of apricot when looked at in the right light. His eyes, if possible, were even lighter than is skin, flashing a calm and oddly suppressed pearly lavender, that right now, was clouded with an angry storm-cloud gray. He looked composedly at the judge and waited for the man to respond.

"E-excuse me?" the judge asked, repeating his trademark line and hoping that it sounded authoritative, but knowing it sounded only ruffled. The smooth man regarded the slowly flustering one with a look of calculating appraisal.

"You heard me," he said calmly, his voice as steady and…_perfect_ as it had been when he had first spoke. "And I will not repeat myself." The judge blinked, taken aback and then his annoyance shone on his face. How dare this man speak so rudely to _him_? He was a very important figure. Politically and lawyerly. To have someone speak so patronizingly to him was just degrading. It was time for him to put his foot down. So be it if people were squished in the process.

"I do not believe you have permission to speak," he said. The man returned his look, with half the effort and ten times the intensity.

"I do not believe you have permission to obscure the truth," he said simply. The Uchiha blinked. This man was purposely going against the word of a judge. And he didn't even know him. Unusual was the only word to describe it, but Sasuke didn't mind. He was even grateful. Hell, if it would guarantee that he would get to keep Shihu, he would take any opportunity. He watched, amazed as the man continued speaking, cutting off the now angry judge.

"The incident involving Mr. Uchiha and his daughter was on TV and it was made perfectly clear by the witness and the authorities that he was attacked and was only defending himself and his daughter," he said smoothly. Sasuke found himself intrigued with the level of sureness with which this man operated. He manipulated the judge's words so easily. Effortlessly. As if he had the whole thing planned out ahead of time and was reading off a written script. And yet, the Uchiha knew that it was unstudied and spontaneous. This man was interesting. And helpful.

"It's not his daughter," the judge growled, trying desperately to say something that would render this man speechless. He was failing spectacularly, though. He barely had time to blink before the man spoke again.

"Pathetic," he said softly. "That's all you can say? It's not his daughter? A point that cannot be ignored is made and all you can do is spout the one thing that can lose this man his child." The judge looked furiously at the man.

"Sit down," he spat slowly through gritted teeth. The man looked at him with seemingly expressionless eyes before he complied and took his seat once again, leaning against the back without ruining his perfect yet relaxed posture. Sasuke watched him with wide eyes and felt a rush of gratitude towards this man and turned his eyes back to the judge to look at him with angry and slightly smug eyes. He couldn't help but feel slightly hopeful now, after that rather excellent display. Well, excellent on the smooth man's part. The judge had crashed and burned. And Sasuke had enjoyed watching him. Sadism was something would never really change about him. It was fixed in his personality and he didn't mind in the least. Another example of his sadistic attitude.

The judge, clearing his throat and rubbing at his temples a little, attempted to regain his composure and looked at the Uchiha with cold eyes.

"Alright, Mr. Uchiha," he said, his voice hiding a still apparent cruelty. "As I was saying, you have initiated two fights and stru—" Sasuke made a noise of anger.

"One!" he said, his voice rising dangerously. "I only started one fight and that was because I was drunk! He-he just said—" He broke off, brandishing his finger wildly at the man who spoke before, as the judge held up a hand. He turned angrily to the man and the Uchiha followed his gaze, surprised and shocked to see that the man now held his hand over his face and was leaning forward as though embarrassed. And then Sasuke realized what was wrong. It had been an outburst. A moment of weakness for the beautiful man that had resulted in him speaking out against the judge in the way he had. As chivalrous as it had been, it had also been foolish. He had angered the judge, the one who was, essentially, controlling the entire outcome, and that, in turn made things worse for Sasuke. All the judge had to do was take out his anger on the Uchiha, and that, he could do by taking away the raven's child.

"Mr. Uchiha, you have initiated _two_ fights and struck your daughter immediately after the second one!" the judge reiterated firmly and forcefully. "You have been coming home drunk even before those incidents and have been yelling at your daughter as a result of that drunkenness. Based on your actions, I think we can both agree that you are not a fit father for a six year old girl." Sasuke felt the anger boil within him. Anger at the judge, at the man who spoke out against the judge, at everyone, for letting him do everything to Shihu, and at himself, for letting himself become weak and easily affected by alcohol and frustration since Naruto's death. Angrily, his fists clenched and his mind lost control of his mouth.

"No!" he shouted. "It was one fight that I started and that was because I was drunk! And the only reason I hit my Shihu, was because I was drunk from the same alcohol that possessed me when I started that fight!" The judge stood and behind him, two guards tensed, preparing to move forward if needed.

"Mr. Uchiha, you will refrain from such shouting or you will be removed from the courtroom and we will continue with the matter of Shihu's new legal guardian without you!" he said threateningly, slowly regaining control over the situation. Sasuke, breathing now quite heavily, slowly leaned back and gritted his teeth, trying to control himself. He was convinced now that the judge was either homophobic, had a personal grudge against him, or both.

"Now, continuing," the judge said, taking his seat, his smug tone hardly concealed. "Mr. Uchiha, since you are not Shihu Uzumaki's biological father, the decision to remove her from your care was made swiftly and simply." Sasuke's eyes narrowed, but he remained in his angered and frozen state, waiting for the judge to continue.

"Our first and most viable option was to give custody of the child to her birth mother, Mrs. Sakura Haruno, but she has renounced her claim on the child," the judge said matter-of-factly. "So, the next legally appointed guardian would be the selected godparent, a Neji Hyuuga. Appointed by yourself and your partner, if I'm not mistaken?" His tone was too readable now. He was reveling in the power that made him untouchable, more verbally than physically, and Sasuke was wondering how much trouble he would get into if he attacked the bastard right there and then. The Uchiha's eyes narrowed into slits.

"Fortunately," the judge spat sarcastically. "Mr. Hyuuga has agreed graciously to come to this case and is present right now. Mr. Hyuuga, if you would please stand?" He gestured to the small crowd and Sasuke's eyes were drawn to the man who had spoken before, now standing straight and tall as he had been. The Uchiha's eyes widened. This was Neji Hyuuga, the next father of _his_ child? The man, Neji, stared at the judge, powerless to do anything else. However, under the piercing gaze of the Hyuuga, the judge seemed to buckle. He turned quickly away, fixing his glare instead on Sasuke, who still had his eyes on the brunette man.

"Neji Hyuuga has agreed to take custody of Shihu Uzumaki and you will be allowed supervised visitation rights every weekend," the judge said. Sasuke's head whipped around to face the aging man and he opened his mouth angrily and spoke.

"Supervised!?" he asked incredulously. "I have to be supervised when I'm visiting _my _child!?" The judge shook his head.

"She is not your child," he repeated. "And, yes, you will be supervised during your visits." Sasuke clenched his fist against the table and looked down. The judge continued.

"You will have one day to get the child's things together and to say goodbye. Mr. Hyuuga will arrive at your house on Monday to pick her up," he said. He continued speaking but Sasuke didn't hear him. His mind had blocked out the rest of the world. He was losing Shihu. Just like that she was going to be taken away from him.

Sasuke didn't hear the judge dismiss him. Come to think of it, he didn't think the judge had even gotten that far. Indeed, he was still talking when Sasuke slowly turned and walked out of the courtroom. The judge had told him numerous times to come back, but he didn't give chase. Neji followed, getting up and leaving at his own leisure. This set the precedent and soon everyone was getting up and leaving as they pleased. The judge was surprised by this upset and tried, though only halfheartedly, to get people to remain in their seats. No one listened though. They were Sasuke's friends; most of them anyway; and they hadn't like the way that meeting ensued at all.

They all followed Sasuke out of the courtroom and the entire incident was forgotten. Though not the punishment it had brought upon the Uchiha. That one thing as etched in everyone's mind. Especially Sasuke's.

The Uchiha arrived home as quickly as possible and had promptly ripped Shihu from Tsukiko and held her close. His arms tightened around her small form and he buried his head in her sweet shining blonde hair. The child was startled at first, but then she relaxed against her father and wrapped her arms around his neck, hugging as tightly as he was her. Tsukiko had apologized profusely over and over again for reporting Sasuke's hitting Shihu as a child abuse case. Sasuke had insisted it wasn't her fault, and that he would've done the same thing, but she still felt the guilt acutely. Especially when Monday came and Neji arrived for Shihu.

It was a cloudy day, but not raining. It was a cool day but not cold. It was a bitter day but nothing else.

Sasuke opened the front door and walked outside, carrying Shihu's suitcases. He stopped when he felt the little girl cling to his leg. He bit back tears as she screamed, "Daddy, don't make me go! I don't want to leave!" The Uchiha winced and dropped the suitcases. Turning swiftly on his heel, the raven pulled the girl up into his arms. He hugged her close and whispered, "I don't want you to go either, Shihu. But, I'll visit you every Saturday. How's that sound?" Shihu pulled away from him, her lower lip quivering and shook her head.

"No!" she cried. "I don't wanna leave you!" Sasuke looked into her teary eyes and felt his own eyes become sufficiently moist. He was aware that all of his friends stood out on the driveway, watching him. He was aware that Neji was standing with a stiff court bitch, who was probably there to make sure that Neji drove away with Shihu. He was aware of that, but he didn't care. He simply let himself cry silently as he put Shihu down and picked up her suitcases, walking to Neji's light-colored car. Half-way there, though, the Hyuuga had met him and offered to take the bags the rest of the way. Sasuke refused stiffly, walking past the brunette man and going to place the bags in the open car trunk. Neji had simply watched him, unreadable expression on his face, before he turned to look at Shihu. His gaze visibly softened and he smiled softly at her. She reminded him of the daughter he would've had, had his wife still been alive. Sakura's eyes were drawn to his face as she observed the cautious and caring emotion that crossed his features. Her brow creased as she came to the conclusion that there was more to Neji Hyuuga than meets the eye. Maybe she would ask Lee about it later. They were, after all, best friends.

Sasuke placed the bags in the too-neat trunk and turned back to Shihu. The girl as standing stubbornly in the doorway, pout in place, refusing to move. The Uchiha laughed as he walked back over to her. He lifted her up in his arms and swung her around, making her giggle. He walked over to Neji and put her down. His gaze moved up so that it fell on the Hyuuga's pearlescent eyes and he stared into the endless orbs.

"Don't take my child from me," Sasuke whispered, his eyes seemingly emotionless. Neji fought the urge to flinch. This man's eyes were so penetrating. The look he was fixated with made the Hyuuga feel horribly guilty and low. He forced himself to return the Uchiha's look and he remained silent. Their eyes remained locked until the piercing voice of the unknown woman broke the reverie. She told them to get a move on. Sasuke looked down at Shihu and bid her one more farewell, before Neji reached down and took her hand, leading her away. She fought to get back to Sasuke, and it was a moment before he fought as well. In the end, he needed to be restrained by Lee, Shikamaru, Chouji and Kiba.

Neji stopped walking to his car and sighed. Kneeling down so that he was relatively at eye level with Shihu, he commanded her attention and whispered something in her ear. Shihu nodded and the Hyuuga released her hand. The little girl ran back to Sasuke and the four men holding him released him as well. The Uchiha fell to his knees and opened his arms as she ran into them. They both stayed there, locked in their final embrace before the irritating bitch spoke up again for them to hurry it along, this time wrenching Shihu away from Sasuke and stuffing the struggling girl into Neji's white car. She closed the door and the Hyuuga shot her a glare that was intensified due to its coupling with the Uchiha's death glare. He got up and started towards the car but Sakura quickly placed her hand on his shoulder, effectively stopping him, but not calming him.

Neji watched the two for a moment before walking to his car, opening the passenger door, reaching into the glove compartment and pulling out a pad and a pen. He quickly scribbled something on one of the notes and ripped it off the pad, throwing it and the pen back into the car. He turned and walked calmly over to Sasuke. He stopped a few feet in front of the Uchiha and reached out, the note clasped in his slender hand. Sasuke looked at it curiously, before slowly extending his own hand and taking it. He read the neat loopy scrawl and his eyes widened. It was an address. Neji's address. Sasuke marveled at it. Was this the Hyuuga's way of telling the Uchiha that he was welcome over anytime to see his daughter? Sasuke looked up at the Hyuuga and the look on the brunette's face confirmed his suspicions. He opened his mouth to say something, but closed it again, turning away. Neji, sensing that the Uchiha wasn't going to say or do anything more, turned and headed back to his car, this time getting in the driver seat. He revved the engine and rolled down Shihu's window. The girl stuck her hand out and cried for he father, reaching out to him. Sasuke only looked away, too pained by the fact that she was being taken away from him. His eyes clenched shut and he heard the car drive away, the sound of its engine and his daughter's cries slowly quieting until there was nothing. He opened his eyes. The court bitch was gone too. She must've come with Neji, Sasuke decided.

He took a deep, shaky breath and turned slowly back towards his house, leaving everyone to stare worriedly after him.

His life, he deduced later that day, was going to hell.

* * *

**Okay, first things first, Neji is not in any way _with_ the "court bitch" as Sasuke described her. She's just there to complicate things. **

**Second, OH MY GAWD, Sasuke and Shihu are separated!! What's Sasuke gonna do??**

**OMG, it's Neji!! He's here at last! And he's just gonna show up more and more, since he is the love interest, here. xD**

**Review please!!**


	6. Neji's Pain

Neji drove silently down the road, Shihu crying silently in the back seat, the woman in the seat next to him chattering like a…bitch.

"I know what you gave him," she accused. Neji raised his brow.

"What do you mean?" he asked, confused. The woman scoffed.

"Oh, don't play dumb!" she said. "I saw you give him your address. And I can assure you, he won't be going anywhere near you or your…daughter anytime except on the weekends. I'm instructed to check up on you every day to make sure everything's alright. So don't think you can sneak him in." Neji looked forward, stoic, indifferent. It annoyed the woman.

"Acknowledge me when I'm talking to you!" she said angrily. "Hey, did you hear me? I said—"

"Get out," Neji said suddenly. The woman blinked and her eyes widened as the Hyuuga swerved the car to the side of the road. He looked at her seriously and she returned his gaze confusedly.

"What?" she asked, perplexed.

"You heard me," Neji said, his voice commanding. "I said get out. Now." The woman looked at him and opened her mouth to say something, but Neji leaned into towards her and she froze. The Hyuuga stopped when their faces were inches apart and his hand slowly extended. She eyed it warily and a blush crept slowly into her cheeks. She shut her eyes, bracing herself for something; anything. But she just heard a click and opened her eyes to see Neji leaning away from her. She felt a chill and turned around to see the passenger door open. She stared for a moment before her gaze fell once again on the brunette man. Sensing that he was serious, she quickly unbuckled her seatbelt and scrambled out of the car. She slammed the door shut and Neji sped away, leaving her perplexed on the side of the road.

In the car, Neji looked carefully at Shihu.

"Forget about what she said, Shihu," he said softly. "I promise you that you'll be able to see your father more often than just weekends." Behind him, Shihu sniffed quietly.

"Daddy," she corrected. Neji looked into the rearview mirror.

"What?" he asked. Shihu buried her face in her hands and sobbed some more before answering.

"His name is Daddy!" she cried. "My father is dead! It's just Daddy and me now!" Neji blinked, surprised but nodded.

"Right," he whispered. "Daddy." He drove the rest of the ride in silence, listening only to Shihu's muffled sobs, his heart aching the whole time.

They arrived at Neji's white house in thirty minutes. Neji got out of the car and took a dejected and upset Shihu's things to the house and he walked with her up the carpeted stairs and told her to pick the room she liked best. She picked the room farthest from his. As soon as her things were unpacked and where she wanted them, the blonde child closed the door and locked it. Neji, standing just outside the door, sighed and turned away from her, trying his best to ignore the frequent cries emanating from the room. He walked silently to his own bedroom, stopping at the room right beside it. The closed door still had the pink flowers on it that he had painted on in preparation for the birth of his own baby girl.

What would've been his baby girl. If it hadn't been for the accident. If his wife was still alive to have given birth. Neji closed his eyes as he remembered the day he'd received the call that his wife; his beloved Tenten, had been in an accident. He had rushed to the hospital as soon as he could. But she was already dead when he got there. The first thing he did was break down. He had fallen to his knees right in the middle of the hospital, weeping uncontrollably. Some people thought he was crazy, others knew his pain and were torn up inside just by watching the horribly anguished sight.

The second thing he'd done was ask if his child was alright. The nurse had only paled and looked down, shaking her head feebly. She led him into the hospital room and the doctor had told him what had happened. How a truck had slammed into the car Tenten was riding in. How a sharp jagged piece of glass had pierced her stomach and still hadn't been completely removed. How the driver had only suffered a small concussion while she had died. And Neji wept again, ignoring the doctor and nurses trying desperately to comfort him. He had just stayed in his state of anguish until Naruto had come to get him.

Naruto. His closest and dearest friend, next to Lee. And now dead as well. Neji remembered when Naruto had shown up at his Tenten's funeral. And Neji remembered the blonde's funeral. He remembered seeing the Uzumaki's husband, Sasuke, weep in front of Naruto's casket, much as he did at Tenten's. Neji sighed, his eyes still closed, and found himself worrying for Sasuke. Perhaps he shouldn't have agreed to take Shihu. Perhaps he should've tried to fight for Sasuke to keep her.

Neji shook his head. No, this was about more than Sasuke. This was about Naruto as well, and Neji had promised him that he would fulfill his promises. And that officially started now.

But first…

Neji reached out and opened the door he had not walked through in years. It would've been the nursery for his little child. Inside were beautiful but dusty pink curtains, framing the windows. There were stuffed animals scattered neatly here and there and the rug was stitched in a very cute design of a smiling sun and a rainbow. Neji's eyes were drawn to the white bassinette in the center of the room. White and empty, the small cradle stood silently and calmly waiting for its soft white blankets to be disturbed by the weight of a small child being placed into its safe confines. But being sorely disappointed. Neji sighed and walked up to the bassinette, reaching a hand out to feel the soft satin. A layer of dust jumped up and then slowly settled back down again. Neji felt the tears acutely. He hadn't had the heart to change anything in this room. He didn't want to forget anything of his previous life, but the memory, he knew, would threaten to leave him if he rearranged anything in that important room.

After a few moments of silent remembrance, Neji turned and left the room, softly closing the door once again. Silently, the Hyuuga went to the stairs and descended them slowly. He stopped at the bottom, memories once again pulling at him. He jerked, blinked and resumed his defeated stride to a special room that he had always called his own. Not shared with anyone else, even Tenten. It held a piano in the very center, and a window beyond that. The curtains were drawn and there was a small writing desk to the side of the room. Neji steered towards the desk and sat down, reaching into one of the drawers to pull out a piece of paper and a pencil. Setting them down, he thought back to the last time he had spontaneously written a poem, as he was doing now. It had indeed been a while. Before Naruto had died. And now he was writing one again.

Pulling the chair in closer to the desk, he leaned over the paper slightly, holding the pencil delicately. Bringing it down to the paper he wrote.

**Let sadness incarnation **

**Keep her silky raven gloss**

**That which once stood proud and tall **

**Now suffers awful loss**

**Eyes soaked red with blood he shed**

**Can happiness e'er be? **

**Or shall he roam the pits of Hell**

**The never salvaged he?**

Neji paused after that line, not sure what to write next. After a moment's debate, he put down his pencil and got up from the desk, leaving the poem to sit by itself, alone and unfinished.

He, instead, went to Shihu's room, in an attempt to talk to her.

"Shihu?" he asked quietly. "May I come in?" There was a shuffling sound as Shihu repositioned herself on her bed. It was a moment before she opened the door. Neji looked down at her and saw in her puffy red glistening eyes that she was frightened and sad. Almost instantly compassion welled up within him. Before he could stop himself, the Hyuuga was on his knees pulling the innocent girl into his arms. She tensed and tried to pull away, but he was reluctant to let go. In the end, though his hold on the girl ceased and he let her shy away from him.

"I'm sorry, Shihu," he said. "I didn't mean to scare you. But I…don't like seeing you cry." He looked softly at her and half expected her to turn away. When she didn't he smiled at her. She sniffled and smiled awkwardly back at him. She took a shy step toward him and tried hugging him. He kept his arms relaxed for a moment, until he felt her grow more comfortable and then lifted them gently up around her. She stepped into him more and he felt a slight dampness on his shirt as she began to cry again. Slowly, he lifted her up into his arms and carried her down to the living room. There, Neji sat down on the couch and positioned her on his lap. She pulled away and slid down in his lap so her head was against his chest. She sniffled.

"Are you going to be my new father?" she whimpered. Neji shook his head.

"Only if you want me to be," he answered quietly. "I'm not going to try to take the place of your father, or your daddy." Shihu pulled away from him and looked into his eyes with her penetrating blue orbs.

"Will I have to change schools?" she asked, her voice adorably unsure. Neji smiled and softly placed his forehead against hers, looking back into her eyes.

"No, you won't have to leave your school," he said. "I promise." He winked at her and she cracked a small smile, and even a giggle.

"Okay," she said. Her frown returned.

"But when will I see Daddy again?" she asked. When Neji hesitated, she added quickly, "He isn't a bad person, he's just sad! He didn't mean to hit me!" Neji looked at her and nodded, pulling her into him again.

"I understand," he said. "I know what your daddy is going through. And you'll see him this weekend. Maybe even sooner, if you're lucky." He smiled and she ventured a very small smile in return. She replaced her head on his chest and sobbed silently into him. The Hyuuga sat with her on his lap and he felt finally like something he could've been a long time ago, though in the worst of ways. He didn't want to raise a child he could not father. And he knew that Shihu would not let him father her so easily. He would be like a kind uncle, but never the father. And that, more than anything was what he wished to be. Closing his eyes gently, Neji bit his lip to prevent himself from making a noise as the tears escaped him. Only a few, though. He wasn't going to wear his heart on his sleeve. Not even around this girl. He wasn't going to make that mistake again.

A rap on his door made him and Shihu look up. Taking the girl up into his arms, Neji went to the front door. He shifted Shihu in his arms so he could grip the knob. Opening the door, he was surprised to see Uchiha Sasuke standing before him, an unreadable look on his face, to be quickly replaced by a look of anger at seeing _his_ daughter in someone else's arms.

"Put her down!" he shouted, starting towards Neji and reaching out to take Shihu from him. Neji turned slightly so he was between Sasuke and Shihu and held out a hand, waiting for Sasuke to calm down. When he did, the Hyuuga stood to the side of the door and indicated for Sasuke to enter. The Uchiha shook his head, stubbornly refusing to enter the house.

"I just want my daughter," he whispered. Neji raised his brow and put a struggling Shihu down. The girl ran to her father and flung her arms around Sasuke's waist. The Uchiha bent over to kiss her head and pick her up, hugging her close to him. Somewhere off to the side, Neji smiled, ushering Sasuke into the house and closing the door behind him. He led Sasuke and Shihu into the living room and, being the ever gracious host, asked Sasuke if he would like a drink. The raven declined and thanked the Hyuuga for allowing him into his home.

"I'm sorry about jumping to the wrong conclusion," Sasuke apologized sheepishly. Neji shook his head.

"I understand why you did it," he said. "Don't let it bother you too much." The Uchiha nodded and tried to smile, but found that he couldn't, as that would be a lie, and a lie in the presence of Shihu, he could not tell. So he just looked at the Hyuuga in what he hoped was a grateful expression.

But inside he felt angry. Angry at this man for taking his beloved daughter from him. Angry at himself for not putting up an adequate fight to keep her. Almost at Naruto for leaving him. But the anger he was supposed to feel toward the blonde never came. He could never be angry at Naruto. Never.

"Mr. Uchiha, are you alright?" Sasuke jerked to see Neji leaning towards him, a soft hand placed on the raven's shoulder, gentle pearl eyes looking worriedly at his stiff form. He moved away quickly, shrugging the hand off of his shoulder, and fixed Neji with a look that must have been disgust, as the Hyuuga flinched slightly at seeing Sasuke's face. He moved away gracefully, walking towards the kitchen to begin Shihu's dinner. Sasuke scowled at that. After all, _he _was the only one allowed to make Shihu's dinner. Not this Neji Hyuuga .

Quickly, he stood up and followed the brunette man into the kitchen. Shihu was still in the living room, looking around curiously, touching this and that and examining everything that looked interesting to her.

"Do you even know how to raise a child?" Sasuke scoffed quietly at Neji when the two were alone. Neji bent over to get a pan and placed it on the stove. He shook his head.

"No," he said bluntly. Sasuke waited for him to say more, but the Hyuuga was silent. And his calm indifferent tone was unnerving and Sasuke didn't like it. He didn't ever remember picking this man to be Shihu's godfather. He only remembered picking Naruto's best friend, the kind, sweet, loving brunette man who was happily married and expecting children. Which reminded him.

"Where's your wife?" Sasuke asked. Neji showed no signs of visible discomfort while he responded.

"She'd dead," he said simply. Sasuke flinched at the lack of emotion in the Hyuuga's voice. Did he not care about the fact that his life companion was dead? Did he never love her in the first place? That was certainly what his tone was dictating. Sasuke's dislike of the man grew, and he scowled at Neji when the brunette man turned to face him.

"You sound like you don't care that she died," the Uchiha accused. Neji froze and stared at the raven.

"You sound like you were just waiting for her to die off so you—" He didn't get to finish, as Neji chose that moment to back Sasuke into the wall and place a hand next to the Uchiha, bracing himself as he leaned in close. Sasuke could see in his eyes emotion similar to his own.

"Uchiha," Neji said, not dangerously, but firmly. "You are welcome here anytime you wish, but while you are here do not speak of my wife that way." He broke off and pushed away, leaving Sasuke standing confused and tense, still against the wall. The Uchiha had expected some kind of threat from the Hyuuga, but when he only received an order, not even a warning, he was confused.

"W-where's the bathroom?" Sasuke asked quietly. Neji indicated for him to follow. He led Sasuke up the stairs and down the hall to a light blue door on the left. Sasuke nodded and thanked him, before heading into the bathroom.

A few minutes later, the sound of running water was heard as Sasuke washed his hands, and then silence. A moment later, the Uchiha emerged from the room. Neji had returned to the kitchen and Shihu was still looking around the house interestedly. Sasuke couldn't help looking around, himself as he walked slowly down the upstairs hall. He stopped, though when he reached a curious door with pink flowers painted onto it. He looked at it for a moment before curiosity took him over and he opened the door to see what was beyond. He stopped when he saw the light yellow wallpaper and the pink curtains. He stopped when he saw the stuffed animals sitting all around the room waiting for someone to hug them close. He stopped when he saw the bassinette in the center of the room, ready and waiting for a child to be placed inside it. He stopped and looked around. His mind flashed back to what Neji had said about his wife being dead. His mind flashed back to the week that he had been out of town for work and received a phone call from Naruto informing him that the blonde's best friend's wife was dead and that he was going to the funeral.

Sasuke's eyes widened when he realized what must've happened. Neji's wife must've been pregnant when she died. And this must've been prepared by Neji and his wife for the arrival of the baby that never came. The Uchiha's mouth twitched and he felt the urge to apologize to the Hyuuga. He had said such cruel things to him in his anger. Things that Neji didn't and hadn't deserved.

Sasuke turned and quickly left the room, closing the door softly behind him. He turned to the stairs, prepared to find Neji but saw that that would be pointless, as the Hyuuga had chosen that moment to come upstairs. Sasuke faced him slightly awkwardly.

"Mr. Hyuuga," he started.

"Neji," Neji corrected. Sasuke nodded.

"Neji," he mended slightly uncomfortably. "I-I'm sorry about those things that I said to you earlier. I-well I was angry and I vented at you. I shouldn't have and I apologize." Neji looked at him.

"Apology accepted," he said, his voice indicating that it was a trivial matter that Sasuke didn't need to worry about. "Did you like my daughter's room?" The Uchiha blinked. Neji's voice had grown suddenly quiet and unsure, and for a moment, Sasuke was wondering if he had imagined the question. But when Neji's eyes met his own in grief-tainted curiosity, he knew that he had not been hearing things. Slowly, he nodded and a sad smile crossed his face.

"You probably spent hours preparing it for her," he said softly. Neji nodded.

"We wanted it to be perfect," he whispered. "Tenten and I." His body twitched slightly and Sasuke felt empathy. He knew what it felt like.

"When did she pass?" he asked gently. Neji turned to look away.

"Three years ago," he said, his voice emotionless and his expression unreadable. Sasuke nodded.

"I'm sorry," he said sincerely. Feeling the air around him become awkward, he turned and walked quickly down the stairs, not knowing why Neji made him feel so unusual. Neji simply watched him go before whispering to himself, "That means more coming from you than anyone else, Sasuke."

* * *

**Oh, Neji's heartbroken too! Coincidence?? I don't think so!! **

**For the record, I hate NejiTen, I only put it in here cuz it seemed to fit the story. I don't think much of SasuNaru either. NejiSasu/SasuNeji is way better. **

**Guess who the poem is about!!**

**Tell me how u all think this story is going so far! I need to know, so review please!! **

**;D**


	7. Daddy, Why Don't You Marry Neji?

Neji invited Sasuke to stay for dinner and Sasuke accepted, thinking only of spending time with his Shihu. Neji had given Sasuke and Shihu very generous portions, while he had only taken a little for himself. He finished long before Sasuke and Shihu and had left the table to clean his plate and leave the small family of two alone together for a while. Sasuke had half a mind to thank him, but was concentrating on making the most of his limited time with Shihu.

"So, Shihu, how do you like it here so far?" he asked. The girl shrugged.

"It's nice, I guess," she said. "And Neji's really nice, but I want to be with you!" Her voice changed to a whine and Sasuke smiled at her, shaking his head sadly.

"Well, you can't live with me like before," he said truthfully. "But I'll visit you every chance I get. I promise." Shihu nodded and jumped down from her chair to run over to the Uchiha, putting her arms up expectantly. The raven smiled and bent down to pick her up, placing her in his lap. She burrowed her head against him, much more comfortably than she did with Neji previously. She held onto him tightly and he held onto her.

"I won't let him be my new Father," she declared quietly. "He can't be Father." Sasuke felt a surge of pride in and gratitude towards Shihu. He had been so afraid that he would've been cast aside for Neji, who, without a doubt could be a very loving father, but when Shihu said those words he was relieved.

But something else was triggered within him as well as relief. A memory of words. Of something he had said to Neji.

_You must've spent hours preparing it for her._

And then he felt guilty. Neji wasn't trying to take his daughter away from him. He was only trying to do what he had promised Naruto and Sasuke he would do. Take care of Shihu in their absence. The Uchiha sighed as he gently placed his hand under Shihu's chin and tilted her head upwards so she was looking at him.

"Give him a chance, Shihu," he said softly. "He doesn't have to be Father or Daddy, but give him a chance to love you. He deserves it." Shihu looked at him with her big shining blue eyes and nodded, laying her head against his chest again. Her breathing slowed and Sasuke thought she had fallen asleep until, with one miraculous burst of energy, she pushed away from him and looked excitedly into his eyes.

"Daddy, Daddy!" she said loudly, her voice overflowing with excitement. "I've just thought of something! Why don't you marry Neji?" Sasuke blinked and looked at her.

"What?" he asked, confused. Neji, who had overheard her shout, was now standing at the door of the kitchen, a glass of milk in hand, and a look of perplexity on his face. Shihu continued.

"Well, then I could stay with you, Daddy and you wouldn't be breaking the rules, and I would be able to give Neji a chance!" she said quickly, explaining her brilliant idea to the confused and surprised adults. "And we would be just like a family again!" She beamed and Sasuke snapped back to reality and shook his head.

"No, Shihu, that-that won't work," he said sheepishly. Shihu's face fell.

"Why not?" she asked dejectedly. Sasuke winced. _God_ how he hated that face. It always made him choke up.

"Well, because, when people get married, it's because they have special feelings for each other," he explained. "Feelings that Mr. Hyuuga and I don't have for each other. And it would too awkward." By now, he was aware of Neji standing in the kitchen doorway, listening, and was slightly unnerved when he didn't verbally agree with him. He didn't see the agreement in the Hyuuga's eyes, though. He didn't know that the brunette man could never love anyone except Tenten. He did know, however, that he could never love anyone but Naruto. Shihu's face lit up. She hopped off his lap and ran to the kitchen door and she grabbed Neji's hand. Pulling the Hyuuga over to her father, she said happily, "That's what dates are for, right? Father told me that once. All you have to do is talk to each other and then you'll get to know each other, and then you'll have those feelings for each other!" She smiled at the both of them and Sasuke palmed his face, embarrassed. Neji gave a small smile to the girl and knelt down beside her.

"Shihu, it takes time to develop those feelings that you're talking about," he said. "It took time with your parents and it took time with my wife and I. And, the first time is always the most influential." Shihu looked confusedly at him.

"What do you mean?" she asked. Neji looked kindly at her.

"I mean it's hard to fall in love a second time," he replied. Shihu's look was still one of perplexity, but she nodded slowly, understanding slightly.

"But what if you try really hard?" she asked. "My Daddy told me that you can do anything if you try." Neji looked up at Sasuke and smiled softly at the Uchiha's obvious embarrassment.

"Well, your daddy's right," he said. "But love is something that happens on its own. And besides that, I've never tried hard to fall in love, and I don't think your daddy had either. It just happened to us." Shihu smiled.

"Well, what if it just happens to you again?" she asked. "What if it just happens that you two fall in love with each other?" Neji couldn't answer that. Leave it to a child to render the normally composed Hyuuga speechless.

What if they fell in love with each other? Shihu was only pointing out that it could happen. And it could, he supposed. Misery loves company and they were both pretty damn miserable. Not that they were desperate to find love. On the contrary, they were desperate to stay away from it. At least Neji was. He wasn't sure what the Uchiha felt.

But what if, by some strange twist of fate, they were to become lovers? What then? What would happen? Neji was confused by that one simple question. It seemed to bring so many more into his mind. His head was now full of "What ifs" and it annoyed him that he couldn't answer any of them. The biggest "what if" of all though, was most definitely, "What if Neji Hyuuga and Sasuke Uchiha fell in love with each other?"

Neji shook his head slightly and Sasuke jerked. Clearly, he had been thinking the same thing. Shihu watched them happily, smile on her face, cheery spark in her eyes, completely ignorant of both men's internal debates. When they didn't say anything, she said, "Try it!" and hurried off to another room to finish her exploring. Neji was left, still kneeling, with Sasuke, who was sitting sideways in his chair, facing the Hyuuga, but watching the door Shihu had just bolted through. To anyone who might've walked in on them at that moment, it would've appeared to them as though Neji was proposing to Sasuke. How ironic.

Neji chuckled, shook his head and stood up, Sasuke following suit.

"Has she always been like that?" the Hyuuga asked, smiling. Sasuke shook his head.

"Sorry about that," he said. "She's never been this nosy." The Hyuuga shrugged.

"I don't mind," he said. "She forced me to consider things that I've never considered since Tenten died." Sasuke looked at him.

"Like loving a man?" he asked a little incredulously. Neji shook his head.

"Like loving again," he corrected. The Uchiha inclined his head, not really agreeing with the Hyuuga. He didn't want to love again. Not after Naruto. Not anyone but Naruto.

"Well, maybe it'll work out for you," Sasuke mumbled. Neji looked at him, brow arched, not missing the hidden meaning within those words.

"Would you not be wiling to try loving someone again?" he asked seriously. The raven shook his head firmly.

"Naruto's the only one," he said. "No one else could ever arouse those sorts of feelings in me. No one else can ever secure my love. Even if it is for Shihu, I can't bring myself to fall in love again." Neji looked at Sasuke with something akin to pity in his eyes. He sighed softly and shook his head.

"Don't sound so bitter," he said. "You're talking about love as though it's a bad thing." He looked at Sasuke with arched brows. The Uchiha shrugged.

"It's only ever a good thing when it's with the right person," he said. Neji looked hard at him.

"Well, wouldn't it be the right person if you were in love with them in the first place?" he asked, his voice aggravatingly calm. Sasuke gritted his teeth.

"Look, why don't you just keep your nose the hell out of my life!?" he shouted angrily. "I don't need your psychology advice! I don't need any pity from you and I sure as hell don't need any help taking care of my daughter!" He stopped his rant and stared angrily at Neji, his breathing hard and heavy. His eyes flashed red dangerously and his fists were clenched tightly. Neji only looked at him with the same pity in his eyes as before. Turning away from Sasuke he asked, "Would you like to stay the night?" Sasuke blinked and jerked. Stay the night? After he had just flown off the handle? After he had just insulted Neji? Quite frankly, the Uchiha was surprised the Hyuuga didn't throw him out of the house!

"Uh," he started awkwardly. "I-I don't think that would be a good idea." Neji nodded.

"Will you be coming over tomorrow?" he asked. Sasuke froze. Tomorrow? He was allowed _back_ to Neji's house? Turning slowly to face the brunette, Sasuke opened his mouth to say something but was cut off by a knock. Sasuke started and Neji's head snapped to face the door, his eyes narrowing.

"Hide," he said firmly to the Uchiha. The raven's brow creased in confusion.

"What?" he asked, perplexed. Neji looked at him.

"Hide," he repeated. "Pick a place and hide. When I tell you to, go up to my room and stay there." Sasuke blinked.

"But why—" He was cut off by Neji's hand, which had positioned itself over his mouth. Neji grabbed Sasuke around the waist and pulled him into a very large pantry. Removing his hand from the man's mouth and telling him to be quiet, Neji quickly shut the door and went to get Shihu.

"Shihu, don't mention the fact that your daddy is here, okay?" he said, picking her up. Shihu looked at him, puzzled.

"Why not?" she asked.

"Because then you may not be able to see him again," he replied. Better to be honest and give her a lot of motivation to be quiet. The girl's eyes widened and she nodded. Neji took her to the door and opened it to reveal the stickler court liaison (a.k.a. court bitch). Her clothes were in slight disarray and her cheeks were very, very red. She was breathing quite heavily, which led Neji to believe that she was very out of shape, or had just run to his house, and her eyes flashed angrily.

"Would you mind telling me what the hell you were thinking!?" she demanded. Neji regarded her with a cold stare and his hold on Shihu tightened a little.

"You were upsetting Shihu," he said simply. "It sounded to me as though you would've started insulting her daddy, and I wasn't going to put up with that, so I told you to get out." The woman rolled her eyes.

"Oh please!" she all but shrieked. "If anyone deserves to be put down he does!" Neji's eyes narrowed and Shihu's mouth quivered. The Hyuuga put Shihu down and the girl hugged his leg tightly, burying her head against the pant. Neji straightened to his full height and glared down at the woman.

"I don't know if you quite understand this," he said. "I threw you out of my car because I didn't want you mocking or ridiculing Shihu or her daddy. What makes you think it's okay to continue talking like that in my house?" The woman was effectively silenced. She shrunk down into her shadow as she watched Neji's eyes flare.

"Alright, alright," she said hurriedly. "I'll stop, but I do have one thing to say to you." Neji looked at her expectantly. The woman straightened and looked boldly into Neji's white eyes.

"Yes?" he urged. She barely concealed a smirk.

"I can't discuss such a private matter outside," she said, her voice mocking. "Please, will you allow me to come inside?" She gestured to the house and Neji, regaining composure, nodded and bent down, picking up Shihu. He moved to the side of the doorway, and the woman stepped into the house, trying not to look smug.

"Would you like anything to drink?" Neji asked, closing the door behind her. The woman shook her head and walked into the living room, plopping down on the couch. The Hyuuga arched a brow and went into the kitchen and placed Shihu on the floor, kneeling down in front of her.

"Just ignore her, Shihu," he said. "She's not going to say anything cruel about your daddy." Shihu nodded and sniffled. Neji winked at her and told her to run up to her room. The little girl nodded and quickly went to the stairs, trying to stay as far away from the stickler liaison as possible. After Neji heard the satisfying sound of a closing door, he stood and went back to the living room. The woman was now roaming the room, touching any and all things that looked interesting to her. Neji winced as she reached a special vase that had been presented to himself and Tenten on their one year anniversary. He quickly walked up to her and rather tightly grasped her hand as it reached out to feel the vase.

"Please don't touch," he said. The woman blinked, taken aback by the seriousness of his deep tone, but wriggled her hand from Neji's vices and let it fall to her side, collecting herself with a straightening of her rather disgruntled jacket and a clearing of her throat. She stood formally and politely, looking him directly in the eyes.

"Now, Mr. Hyuuga," she said. "If I may get back to the point, I will say that I will be visiting you every day to make certain that Shihu has been transferred to a decent home and suitable living conditions. As well as make sure that no _unwanted _guests show up." Neji raised a brow at her explanation but chose to stay silent. The woman continued.

"After that little outburst at court, the judge thinks that you need to be watched carefully," she said, a little too smugly for Neji's liking. "He doesn't want that horri--"

"Excuse me," Neji interrupted firmly, a hint of fierceness in his voice. "But I thought I made it clear that you were not to talk of Shihu or her daddy in any way that would put them down or insult them. That rule is not to be breeched" The woman looked slightly disconcerted at Neji's unusually forceful tone of voice. She backed away slightly and stuttered, "I-I think I will have that drink." Neji nodded and walked composedly and elegantly towards the kitchen. When he reached the kitchen he heard a noise and turned to see Sasuke coming out of the pantry, a stunned look on his face. Neji quickly hurried over to the man and asked, "Did you hear that?" Sasuke nodded and opened his mouth to answer, but stopped as he heard the footsteps of the liaison, signifying that she was approaching.

Now, very unfortunately, Neji had not the proper amount of time to shove Sasuke back into the pantry without looking suspicious, so he did the first thing he thought of that might provide a decent explanation as to why Sasuke was there.

He kissed him.

Not a hurried kiss, nor a peck on the lips. A deep, passionate, intimate, French kiss. Although, it was also fake.

Sasuke's eyes widened as Neji's mouth closed over his. The woman stopped walking as soon as she saw the unusual sight. Her eyes widened, and her mouth, which was already opening to release a question, fell open and anything she was about to say, died in her throat before it even reached her mouth. She stared as Neji fervently kissed Sasuke. Instinctively, the Uchiha pushed at Neji, but the brunette man only repositioned his mouth by Sasuke's ear and whispered, "Play along." Sasuke's eyes then flashed quickly to the liaison and comprehension dawned on him. He let his eyes fall closed and he pressed his lips against Neji's hoping desperately that this sudden daring act would convince the woman that he was here for reasons different than his true ones.

Tongues played, hands roamed, groans were heard; it was all very convincing. Sasuke and Neji were both quite stunned at their willingness to kiss a person who wasn't their spouse. And Neji was surprised that he had so willingly kissed a male! Although, he reasoned with himself, it was very hurried and called for. It's not as though there was any other choice. Sasuke would have most definitely been thrown out had he not done this.

Then again, there was still a chance that the court bitch would see through their ruse and report this to that wretched judge. Neji pushed that thought aside as he pulled away from Sasuke and turned to the liaison, who was standing and blushing in the doorway to the kitchen. He arched a brow.

"I-I," he started, feigning an unsure man just caught kissing another man; admittedly, one who should not even be there. "I was just going to get your drink..." He broke off and turned to Sasuke, feigning awkwardness. He saw that the Uchiha didn't need to pretend to be awkward. His face was pale and he stood stiff and frozen, the realization of what had just happened starting to sink. The woman raised a hand, blinking, and seemed to realize who was standing before her.

"You," she started, slowly regaining her voice. "You're Sasuke Uchiha, th-the one who--what are you doing here!?" Sasuke, regaining his composure and recovering the ability to think quickly pushed Neji away from him, trying his best to blush.

"I-I wasn't-I mean," Sasuke stuttered, just as convincingly as Neji. The Uchiha's eyes widened and he looked anywhere but Neji and the woman. The Hyuuga looked to the liaison, taking a deep breath.

"Obviously, you can tell that Sasuke Uchiha and I are romantically involved with each other," he said, his voice stiff and unsettled. The woman blinked and found her voice.

"But you were married to a woman!" she all but shrieked. Neji shrugged.

"I'm bisexual," he said simply. "Misery loves company and Sasuke and I are both very miserable. It's not really what you could call a relationship as we're both on the rebound. It's more of a fling, really." Sasuke was surprised by Neji's sure tone, that wavered just enough to fool the woman into thinking that he was trying to hide his awkwardness. He couldn't help but admire Neji's skill with deceit. The woman raised her brow and recovered her irritated and superior air. Looking between the two men she said, "This will not be allowed to continue! I will report this to the judge!" She turned to leave, but felt two hands grab her and froze at the realization of who those hands belonged to.

"Please don't," Neji said, his voice deadly calm and soft. "Sasuke did not come here to see Shihu. He did not come here to spite you, or the judge, or the law. He came because I asked him to. I implore you, please don't blame him. It wasn't his fault. It was simply a moment of weakness on my part." He ignored the glance that Sasuke cast him and continued to watch the woman, who's back was still turned to them. Her shoulders fell as she heaved a sigh.

"Fine," she mumbled. "I'll let you off with a warning." She stopped and whirled around, sending both men's hands flying off of her.

"But, if you don't discontinue this disgusting affair, I will see to it that you are both punished! Do I make myself clear?" Neji nodded, and arched a brow, not bothering to hide his look of contempt.

"Ardently," he replied derisively. The liaison's eyes narrowed.

"I'll see myself out," she growled. Neji nodded and indicated to the door. With that, the unwanted woman turned on her heel and stormed out of the house, slamming the door behind her. The room was quiet for a moment, the soft panting of Sasuke being the only audible thing. He slowly turned to Neji.

"That was--" he stopped awkwardly. "Convincing." Neji nodded, his face returning to its normal stoic deadpan.

"It was," he agreed, his voice even. "Would you like to leave directly, as she did, or would you like to stay longer? Shihu's room is the last one on the right upstairs." He turned to Sasuke and waited patiently for an answer. The Uchiha began to feel very tense under Neji's bitter, silver stare. He squirmed slightly and turned away.

"I-I think I should probably go," he said, his voice cracking slightly. Neji nodded and looked at the Uchiha.

"When do you think you'll be coming again?" he asked. Sasuke's head whipped around and the Uchiha gawked at the Hyuuga. Incredible! They had just been so close to getting in horrible trouble with the court and Neji was proposing they break the law again? Was he sane? Sasuke shook his head quickly, trying to reclaim his shell shocked voice.

"You can't be serious!" the Uchiha breathed, conveying the immense shock wrought confusion he felt. "We could've been in serious trouble, and you want to risk getting into that trouble again!?" Neji turned away, shrugging.

"I thought you wanted to see your daughter," he said stoically. Sasuke nodded, his face adopting a look of utter surprise.

"Of course I want to see my daughter," he said, as though it were obvious, which it was. "But, I don't want the legal privilege taken away from me!" Neji was silent for a moment. Finally, he jerked and turned back to Sasuke, an empty smile on his face.

"I understand," he said. "Well, if you ever desire to come here again, feel free to come. I won't stop you. Just be careful of your timing." With that, the Hyuuga walked off to finish his cleaning of the kitchen. Sasuke was left to watch after him incredulously. _Neji, you're..._ Sasuke thought. _What were you going to say..?_ The Uchiha shook his head and turned around, walking back into the living room. He sat down on the couch and put his face in his hands, resting his elbows on his knees. His eyes closed and he heaved a breathy sigh. What was he going to do now? Neji made it clear that he could come anytime he wanted, and that tempted him to come more often. But he didn't want to lose any legal rights he had to visit Shihu. And what's more he didn't want to have to pay a fine or go to prison.

But the thought of supervised visitation rights being the only legal way he could see his beloved daughter was simply revolting. The prospect of having some stickler breathing down his neck every time he tried to hug his child was almost too much to bear. But the thought of even having that taken away from him was much, much worse. He knew that. He would simply have to wait for the weekend to come in order to see his child. Yes, that was it. That was all he could do.

Sasuke nodded to himself as he came to his resolution, and his mind was brought over to the kiss he'd shared with Neji. He was gay, he wasn't going to deny that he didn't mind it. But it hadn't been something he would ask for again. It hadn't turned him on, hadn't made him tingle with excitement, only disgust. A man other than Naruto had been kissing him. A man he had only known for little more than a few hours, and a man who was as miserable as he and who was no doubt mulling disgustedly over the exact same memory as he. Sasuke sighed. The touch had been confusing, but his body had been acting on its own. His body had been reacting to the feel of Neji's lips and his mind, however repulsed it was, couldn't stop it. Willpower, no matter how powerful, is no match for physical strength, no matter how weak. That was a fact of life, never to be changed.

The Uchiha jerked his head, trying to shake the image of Neji's hands on his body from his mind. He stood up and walked distractedly around, calming his breathing and not really thinking about anything but that unwanted action. The raven strayed into a new and different room and his attention was drawn to the piano at the very center. He smiled a sad smile. it was just like the one Shihu had practiced on. He walked over to it and reached out, absentmindedly running his hand over the smooth black surface. His lips parted a fraction as he remembered Naruto sitting next to Shihu on the piano stool trying to learn the notes, while a very patient Shihu would go over the black and white keys, trying to teach him what her teacher had taught her. He almost laughed at the memory. It had been such a fond and happy time. Now gone.

Sasuke sighed and turned his attention to a small writing desk sitting by the side of the room. A small piece of paper sat neatly on the top of the desk, resting quietly and peacefully underneath a pencil, perfectly sharpened and with almost no eraser, having been used and worn so much. The Uchiha approached the small desk and bent over to read the paper.

**Let sadness incarnation **

**Keep her silky raven gloss**

**That which once stood proud and tall **

**Now suffers awful loss**

**Eyes soaked red with blood he shed**

**Can happiness e'er be? **

**Or shall he roam the pits of Hell**

**The never salvaged he?**

Sasuke blinked. It was...tragic. Beautifully tragic. It almost reminded Sasuke of..._himself._ Almost. The Uchiha looked it over one more time and then his gaze lifted to the pale blue wall before him.

Just who _was _Neji Hyuuga?

* * *

**Ok, you'll have to tell me how that was and if I should change anything. **

**Neji KISSED Sasuke!! Thought I should just throw that in there to see what would happen!! ;3 I think it worked out pretty well!! What do u guyses think??**

**Review, review, review!! Please.**


	8. I'm Confused

"Daddy, what happened?" a slightly excited Shihu asked as Sasuke walked into her room. The Uchiha sat down on her bed and positioned the nervous girl in his lap.

"Nothing, Shihu," he said. "We just...discussed some things with the court liaison. That's all." Shihu grinned widely at her daddy.

"No you didn't!" she exclaimed loudly. "You kissed Neji! I saw you from the stairs!" Sasuke stared at her incredulously.

"Ah-what were you doing there!?" he asked, his voice rising. "I thought Neji told you to go to your room!" Shihu's grin only turned more mischievous.

"See?" she teased. "You even talk like you're married to him! And anyway, I heard a shout and came downstairs to see what was going on and saw you and Neji kissing." Sasuke flushed and spluttered, staring wide-eyed at his daughter. Shihu merely gave him an innocent smile.

"Daddy, you kissed him," she reiterated. "That means you can marry him, right?" Sasuke was silent as he surveyed her. He had never heard anything so simple in his life. But then, it didn't make any sense! And yet, it made all the sense in the world. _Ugh. My brain hurts._

Shaking his head and replacing his daughter on the bed, Sasuke slowly stood up and sighed.

"Shihu, stay in your room," he said firmly. "I've got to go...finish something." And by 'finish something' he meant talk to Neji and ask him what the hell he was thinking when he had..._violated his personal space_.

Thinking confusing thoughts and trying to find some logical explanation for what the Hyuuga did, Sasuke descended the stairs. He stopped, though, as he reached the final one. His brow furrowed.

Music. That's what he was hearing, music. Soft and delicate notes from a piano.

The music was beautiful. So quiet and fragile. The notes were flowing and legato and every single one melded into the next to form an imminently mesmerizing song. It was played in a minor key and had a definite mysterious quality to it, and it was almost depressing. Not quite the latter, but most assuredly contemplative.

Unconsciously quieting his breathing so as not to interfere with the song, Sasuke took careful and slightly hesitant steps towards the room from where the music was emanating.

He came to a halt as soon as Neji came into view and simply watched. The Hyuuga's back was to him and he was sitting straight and tall. He was swaying slightly as his hands glided across the black and white keys and his hair blocked any part of his face that Sasuke might have seen from his angle. Neji's feet worked the pedals lightly and gently, as though they were made of glass and he might shatter them with one simple misguided movement.

He treated the keys on the piano with much more care. The Uchiha watched closely as Neji's fingers pressed the black and white bars so lightly that it could be comparable to the gentility of a ripple moving through a pond.

The Hyuuga was caressing the piano with the touch of a lover, softly fondling a loved one.

As the song came to a slow halt, the last notes fading into nothingness, Sasuke's breath released. His eyes were slightly wide and his mouth was parted. Never before had he heard anyone play so beautifully.

He watched silently as Neji sighed and carefully, lovingly, lowered the piano cover, before replacing his arms on it and letting his head slump forward.

"You can come in now, Sasuke, I'm finished," the Hyuuga called gently, a broken tone to his voice. Sasuke, far from being surprised that the Hyuuga noticed him there, walked silently into the room and stopped a good distance from the Hyuuga. He waited silently for Neji to turn and face him.

"Can I help you with anything at all?" the brunette asked politely. Sasuke took a step towards him.

"I want to know why," he stopped and rethought his approach. "No. I want to know what that kiss meant to you. How you interpret it." He looked at Neji with an unreadable expression on his face, which Neji's own reflected back. The Hyuuga pondered his answer for a moment before taking a breath and voicing his thoughts.

"I can't honestly say that I was completely unaffected," he confessed. "This was the first time I had ever kissed a man before, and the experience certainly wasn't disappointing." Sasuke tensed. Was Neji saying that he was…attracted to him?

"But," Neji continued. "That feeling of whatever it was, was most definitely overshadowed by self-disgust and guilt. I felt as though I was betraying my late wife. I'm sure you felt the same?" He looked solemnly at Sasuke and the Uchiha nodded.

"Yes, I felt the same," he agreed. "But I still owe you for letting me—"

"You don't owe me for anything, as I was the reason you were in so many predicaments in the first place," Neji interjected sternly. "And I won't accept any favors that you believe will get you out of your so-called 'debt' to me." Sasuke was slightly taken aback at these words. He watched silently as Neji stood from the piano bench and made his way to the door.

"I'm sorry," he said at the threshold. "I think I already asked you this. But would you like to stay, or are you going to leave?" The Uchiha sighed softly and responded, "I'm going to leave. I don't think it'd be the best decision for me to stay longer. Say goodbye to Shihu for me." Neji turned and looked at him with a peculiar expression on his face. Sasuke ignored it and went to the door. Neji closed his eyes and simply stood for a moment, quiet and thoughtful.

Sasuke walked quietly to the door and the hall was filled with an oppressed and strained silence. Neji handed Sasuke his coat and Sasuke stiffly uttered a thank you.

"Mr. Uchiha," Neji said seriously before the door closed. Sasuke stopped.

"Yes?" he replied uncomfortably. Neji swallowed before he said, "I would like to apologize for what I did. I realize now that there were several other ways I could've saved the situation, and I am very sorry." Feeling more awkward than he had ever felt in his life, Neji cut himself off and shifted nervously from foot to foot. Sasuke watched him for a moment before he turned around and left without a word.

Neji let out a relieved sigh as soon as the door closed and moved tiredly to his couch, flopping down on it gracelessly.

He had never been so uncomfortable in his life! He had no idea that one person could reduce him to such awkwardness.

"Neji?" Neji turned to see a perplexed Shihu walking towards him unsurely. He quickly sat up and smiled at her.

"What is it, Shihu?" he asked gently. Shihu looked at him and bit her lip cutely.

"Did Daddy leave already?" she asked, dreading the answer. Neji furrowed his brow and was silent for a moment. After a moment he nodded.

"Yes, Shihu, your daddy left already," he replied in a defeated tone. He found recently that he hated being the bearer of bad news when it came to the little girl. But now, he couldn't help it. Shihu looked down dejectedly and she nodded, a tense silence filling the room. Neji moved forward but then stopped, not sure whether or not comfort would be accepted by the young girl.

"I'm sorry, Shihu," the Hyuuga said. "Would you like to come sit with me?" Shihu didn't even look at him as she shook her head and hurried up to her room.

Neji watched with a pang at his heart as Shihu flat out rejected his offer. It was a painful thing to be rejected.

* * *

Shihu sat on her bed, sniffling quietly.

"Daddy," she whimpered. "Why are leaving me?" She ran a hand across her nose as her thoughts turned to Neji. The man was nice enough, she knew that much. But she couldn't help her nervousness around him. He seemed so very…larger than life. He seemed to cast a long shadow from where Shihu stood and he scared her quite a bit. Even though he didn't seem to mean to. After all, he had been so gentle with her earlier that day when she was crying. His arms had been soft too, and warm to Shihu.

But, after the tears had subsided and after Sasuke had left, she had felt rather embarrassed about it. She didn't know why, it was just one of those things that you don't think about until after it happens. She supposed it was because, until that day, he had been a complete stranger and she had just let him do something only Daddy or Father was ever allowed to do.

Rubbing roughly at her running nose, the girl let herself down from her bed and walked to the door. She unlocked it and walked out into the hall. Looking around cautiously, she walked silently down the stairs and into the living room. She breathed a sigh of relief and smiled. Neji wasn't there. He was probably in the kitchen or at the piano or something, she figured. When she heard soft breathing coming from the couch, her brow furrowed. Curious, she moved carefully over to the sofa, as though afraid of being grabbed by some fearsome monster if she moved too fast.

Because the back of the couch was facing her, she couldn't see who was resting on the other side. She rounded the side of it carefully, thinking of the horror movies she had seen in which the main protagonist was in a similar situation as she, and couldn't help but shiver at the thought of a bloody undead corpse laying sprawled over the couch cushions waiting to eat her flesh.

When she saw what, or rather who, really lay there, she couldn't help but gasp.

Neji, silent and stiff, lay on the couch, clearly asleep, tears falling from his eyes in miniscule doses, body quivering slightly, eyes clenched tightly shut. Clearly the man was having a nightmare.

Shihu's own eyes widened and she hurried around to wake him. Shaking his shoulder and calling his name, the young girl tried to banish the fear that seeing such a strong man in such a weak state aroused in her…

* * *

_Neji sat in a boardroom filled with many of his coworkers and his boss. He blinked, confused as his boss stood and began pacing the room, speaking about the pitch that he wanted Neji to give next week. The men and women sitting around the table all turned to the Hyuuga and nodded simultaneously as the man said something that Neji couldn't hear. _

_"Excuse me, sir, but could you repeat yourself?" Neji asked politely. The man glared at Neji and repeated what he had said. But still, Neji could hear nothing. He turned his head slightly and his brows knitted together. _

_"What?" he asked again, noticing that his voice was getting softer and softer with every word he said. Panicking, Neji shouted, "I can't hear you!" But he could only hear a soft whisper come from his mouth. He stood up immediately, eyes swiveling this way and that, as though he could somehow find the answer to this riddle if he looked hard enough. _

_Indignant, the balding and portly man shouted something at the Hyuuga, gesturing wildly with his arms and walking around the table towards Neji. The brunette moved away from him, taking steps backwards and eyeing him warily. _

_Then, suddenly the portly man blurred in Neji's vision, and turned into Tenten. And Neji almost retched. She was bloody and mangled, her stomach a deep crimson red and gashed something awful. Her face was covered with cuts and slashes and even more blood. Neji was sure he had never seen a more garish sight! Her left arm had a large gaping hole in it, as though it had tried to protect her stomach when the large piece of glass had pierced it. In her right arm, she held the most revolting thing of all. _

_A child. Their child. Bloody and unborn, looking as though it had been ripped from her stomach, and harbored in the crook of his late wife's right arm. But Tenten wasn't holding the child lovingly, she wasn't carrying her tenderly, the child's little body was dangling disgustingly down by her side, her arm squeezing her in an iron vice that was sure to have killed the girl if the crash hadn't. Neji flinched and brought a hand to his mouth. The child was unrecognizable in its fetal and bloody glory._

_"Where the hell were you, Neji!?" Tenten screamed wildly, her face twisted and frightening. Neji winced and opened his mouth to answer, but nothing came out. _

_"Why weren't you there!?" the woman shrieked shrilly, her voice piercing Neji's ears and giving him chills. "Why weren't you there to die with me, you bastard!? _

_"You should've been there, you're my _husband_!! You're supposed to stand by my side even in death! You son of a bitch! Die, Neji! Die and go to hell for not dying with me!!" She started towards him madly, and Neji turned instinctively, trying to get away from the force that was his dead wife. He panicked even more when he saw that the area that was the door was now nothing but a blank wall. _

_"Neji, don't try to get away from me!" Tenten roared, coming closer to Neji rapidly. The Hyuuga was now shining with sweat, unable to move away from the advancing woman. _

_"You will come with me and we _will _be together FOREVER!!!" She reached out a bloody hand that was missing several digits and spat angrily, splattering the crimson liquid all over his face. Neji watched her hand with apparent fear and tried not to scream as it closed down over his arm in an iron grip…_

* * *

Neji shot up immediately, taking no notice of the yelping girl jumping away from him in surprise. His mind was only on the image of that horrible blood covering that horrible memory of a woman that was his wife. It seemed the sweating in his dream had been a reflection of what was really going on, as he was covered in a thin layer of the salty stuff.

_"You should've been there…" _

Neji winced as he remembered her shrill voice that sounded nothing like his beloved wife when he knew her.

And then he remembered the fetus she was gripping. A surge in his stomach had the Hyuuga off the couch and pelting towards the bathroom in a heartbeat. He ripped the door open and bolted to the toilet. Leaning over the bowl, his stomach emptied itself of its contents, and he closed his eyes as he heard the noise of the bitter vomit fall into the toilet. Instinctively, he reached out and weakly pulled the silver handle, listening silently to the sound of the swirling mixture as it disappeared in a slow spiral. He leaned back, panting heavily, eyes still shut, and tried to force the gruesome image of his unborn child being held so grotesquely from his mind.

After a few moments of nothing but mental counting and deep breaths, Neji turned around, prepared to leave, and came face to face with an absolutely petrified Shihu. Her eyes were wide, her hands were over her mouth, her face was pale, and her body was frozen. She stood directly on the threshold of the doorway and stared at Neji, afraid to move. Wisely, the Hyuuga did not move towards her, only gave a hollow smile and said softly, "I'm sorry, Shihu. I wish you hadn't seen that." He stayed still a while longer, perfectly prepared to wait until she turned and left, but was surprised when she dropped her hands and asked, "Are you sick, Neji?" Neji blinked, taken aback by the question and shook his head.

"No, Shihu," he replied. "I'm not sick. I just saw something that I…that was very disgusting." Shihu's forehead scrunched up and she cocked her head to the side.

"But you just threw up," she protested bluntly. "Don't you have to be sick to throw up?" Neji gave a light chuckle, the only thing his still aching stomach would allow, and shook his head.

"No, there are exceptions to that rule," he said. She nodded her head, encouraging him to continue.

"When you see something that makes your stomach feel all fluttery and unsteady, then you throw up," he said simply. "When you eat too much and your stomach can't hold it all, then you throw up. For some people, going on roller coasters makes them throw up. You don't have to be sick to throw up, Shihu, is the basic point." Shihu looked at him confusedly, signifying to Neji that she didn't get it at all. Neji smiled and carefully stood up.

"I'm not very good at explaining things, am I?" he asked good-naturedly. Shihu shook her head and looked at him warily. The Hyuuga smiled.

"Don't worry, Shihu," he said. "I'm not going to throw up again." Shihu nodded, quickly did a 180 and sped out of the bathroom.

Neji watched her go sadly and sighed. He shook his head and left the bathroom, blinking leftover tears from his eyes and taking very cautious steps, so as not to upset the fragile balance that had settled in his stomach. He groaned and walked to the kitchen, speeding up slightly as he neared his destination. He reached out and took the phone from the receiver and sat heavily down in the single chair by the table. Heaving another wearied sigh, Neji dialed Lee's number and waited, his mind a jumbled and exhausted mess.

* * *

Shihu was about to skip gaily into the kitchen to pour herself some milk and perhaps get herself a bowl of fruit loops (everyone had fruit loops, she figured. It was a law of life.), when she heard Neji speak.

"Lee." His voice sounded strained and hollow. She couldn't hear anything that was being said on the other line, though. Her brow furrowed. _Neji?_ she thought worriedly. _What's going on?_ She made sure to quiet her breathing as best she could when the Hyuuga spoke again.

"Lee, I—" he started. "I know I sound like I'm a frightened child, but I—I had another nightmare…" He paused and Shihu thought rapidly back to the nightmare that had frightened Neji so only a few minutes prior. Had he been having a lot of nightmares? Was that why he seemed so scared?

"No, I—Tenten, she—" He broke off and sighed. "It's the guilt, Lee. It's the guilt. I should've been the one to drive her there. Then at least, I would've been able to go with her. She—"

"…Lee, you didn't see her! It was awful, Lee! I didn't even need to attend that meeting, I _chose _to! And that—"

"…No, don't come _over_! Shihu's here and I—Lee? Lee!"

"…He hung up. Perfect." Angrily, Neji pushed the 'End' button and placed he phone back on the receiver in a forced way. He moved to place a hand on the table and allowed his weight to fall onto the resting hand. His free hand, he brought up to his temple and rubbed.

"God…" he muttered to himself. He took a deep breath and then released it, taking no notice of the fact that it came out a little shakier than he would've wanted, and started to walk towards Shihu.

Gasping to herself, desperate to keep up the little game of cat and mouse she had going, Shihu bolted from the room.

* * *

Neji heard a knock at the door and hurried to answer it.

"Neji!" Lee gasped desperately, grasping Neji's hands tightly and hurrying into the house. He peered worriedly into the other man's eyes. He was always so overly dramatic.

"Lee, relax, it was just a nightmare," Neji sighed, rolling his own white eyes and pulling his hands out of Lee's grip. "I honestly didn't think you would come over. If I had known that then I wouldn't have bothered to call you." Lee looked at him seriously.

"That is a very unyouthful thing to say, my friend!" he declared. Neji gave a weak chuckle.

"Well, I'm not very youthful anymore, Lee," he sighed. Lee gasped and looked at Neji with wide eyes, scandalized.

"Neji, my passionate friend of old!" he said dramatically. "You and I both know that this is not true! Your heart beats with a youthful fire that will never die, no matter how many people wrong you, no matter how much you lose, it will ALWAYS be there, just as I will be! Neji, I swear this to you!" Neji laughed and shook his head.

"Of course, Lee," he agreed wearily. "But if what you say is true, then that fire is being sorely tested right now." As if to accentuate his words, Neji brought a hand up to his chest and clutched at the shirt fabric that covered it, the pang back in his eyes. He drew a shuddering breath and was immediately pulled into his friend's comforting embrace.

"Now, tell me of this nightmare that had the great Neji Hyuuga shaking," Lee urged quietly. Sometimes Neji was surprised at how gentle his hyper friend could be. The Hyuuga hesitated for a moment, but Lee was patient.

"Well…"

* * *

Shihu watched from the doorway as Neji let her Uncle Lee hug him. She gasped. Wasn't Uncle Lee married to Mommy? Yeah, he was. So why was he hugging Neji just like Father and Daddy used to. It confused her. Was Uncle Lee in love with Neji? Was Neji in love with Uncle Lee? It made no sense!

Nevertheless, she watched as Neji pulled away and moved to sit weakly on the couch. Lee followed him, but didn't hug him again. Only watched him carefully. He looked nervous, Shihu noted. Was there something that scared him? Was it something that Neji was saying? Was it something 'disgusting,' as Neji had described to her earlier? Was he going to throw up?

The young girl couldn't hear much of what they were saying, and what she could hear made no sense to her. Guilt, Neji had said. What did he feel guilty about? Guilt was the same thing as feeling bad, right? Daddy had told her that once. But why would Neji feel bad? Shihu's brow furrowed as she continued to listen as best she could.

Not his fault? Uncle Lee had said that. What wasn't his fault? Once again, Shihu was behind the sofa and couldn't see much with the exception of her uncle's head and Neji's head, which soon disappeared below the back of the couch as he leaned forward. Lee's head disappeared slightly as well, so he could be closer to eyelevel with Neji. Their words became harder to hear.

Forget it? Forget what?

"I can't, Lee!" Neji suddenly shouted. Both Shihu and Lee jumped back, surprised. Neji straightened now and was turned to face Lee, his face all angry and upset, just like Shihu had seen Daddy's a lot recently.

"I can't just forget about it!" he said, his voice unlike anything Shihu had ever heard. It sounded like he was about to cry.

"You don't get it, do you!" he shouted again. "I can't just forget about the whole thing! How do you expect me to? She was my _wife_, Lee! My wife! Don't you think I've been trying to move on? Don't you think that I've been trying to forget about her? Why do think I tried dating that woman two years ago?" There was silence and Neji's breath was fast and hard, it scared Shihu. Uncle Lee, she saw, was only looking at Neji.

"But I – I don't want to forget her, Lee," Neji said softly. "I don't want to. I love her and I can't – I can't just –" He stopped and Lee stood up.

Shihu watched quietly as her uncle placed a hand on Neji's shoulder and silently drew him to his chest again. And again Shihu was confused. Why?

* * *

"Lee, you should go," Neji whispered against the slightly taller of the two. Lee nodded.

"I know," he said simply. "But are you sure you're going to be alright? You seem to be getting worse and worse every time I see you." He pulled away to look seriously at the Hyuuga. Neji shrugged.

"I suppose it has something to do with Sasuke and Shihu," he guessed. "They keep reminding me of the family I could've had, I think." He fell silent and his eyes found the floor, staring at the carpet in a dejected way. Lee's monstrous brows knitted together and he reluctantly moved to the door. He hadn't bothered to take a coat. Neji followed him slowly.

"Don't worry, I'll keep in touch," Neji assured, before Lee could speak a word. Lee looked at him curiously but nodded. After a rather stiff goodbye, on Neji's part, the ebon-haired man turned and left, shutting the door behind him. Neji sighed and moved to his piano.

* * *

"Sakura, my lovely little cherry blossom, I'm home!!" Lee shouted into his and Sakura's cozy house.

"Oh, I'm in the living room with Ino, give us a minute, okay?" her voice shouted at him from down the hall. Lee beamed and nodded to no one in particular, moving to the kitchen at the other end of the house to start dinner.

Sakura smiled warmly, shaking her head fondly at her husband's antics and turned back to the blonde Yamanaka, sitting across from her with a slightly irritated expression on her face.

"Sorry, what were you saying?" the Haruno asked. Ino shook her head.

"What a complete and total _idiot_ you are?" she supplied. Sakura blinked and glared.

"Ino, I wanted advice from you, not insults," Sakura said blatantly. "Please, I really need help with this." Ino nodded her head exaggeratedly.

"Like hell you do!" she agreed in her usual over the top voice. "Why on earth would you keep this from him for so long? Why didn't you just tell him all those years ago? How many was it? Three?" Sakura nodded somberly.

"Yeah, it was three years ago," she said. "And what was I supposed to do? I mean, how can _I_ be expected to give my husband's best friend possibly the worst information he could ever get in his life? How do you propose I go about that, Ino?" The blonde shook her head.

"How should I know?" she asked seriously. "I _never_ expected to hear _this_ when you told me you had something important to say! I expected that you were having your first mood swing or something, not that –" Sakura's hand immediately clapped over her mouth.

"Will you shut up!?" she hissed. "Lee's in the other room!" Ino's eyes widened and she immediately shoved Sakura's hand away.

"Hold on a second!" she said. "You mean you haven't even told your _husband_!?" She gestured wildly towards the kitchen, where Lee could be heard singing along to Billy Joel tunes. The Haruno winced and shook her head.

"Holy _shit_, you're in deep!" Ino all but shouted. Sakura's green eyes flew to the doorway immediately and she gestured for Ino to be quiet.

"_Please_, Ino!" she pleaded. "I really want you to keep this quiet! I am begging you! I'm just trying to find the right time to tell him!" Ino rolled her eyes.

"You've had plenty of 'right times' that you could've taken over the past three years!" she said indignantly. "The best of which probably would've been as soon as you were told." Sakura looked down in defeat.

"I know," she whispered.

* * *

**Ooooookaaaaay...now things get confusing. Well, first things first, the lines mean that the point of views are changing, mainly from Neji's to Shihu's, so naturally, the things that Shihu knows about what's going on are far less than the number of things that Neji knows are. And the whole thing with Lee, Neji is not in love with, nor is he involved in any affair with the cuddly little hyper guy (Lee). They're just great friends and I love LeeNeji FRIENDSHIP, there's gonna be a lot of that in this fic, F.Y.I. **

**I just majorly deepened the plot there. I loooove confusing plot lines! Any predictions as to what Sakura was talking about with Ino?? **

**Oh yeah, and I am soooooooo sorry for not having updated sooner, I was in a major writing slump that I finally have gotten out of!! So that means quicker updates, people! YAY!! **

**Oh, and don't forget to review if you love it or if you hate it, just be nice about it if it is the latter. Ja!**


	9. Teacher

Sasuke awoke that morning alone, as usual. Sasuke got up that morning alone, as usual. Sasuke ate breakfast that morning alone, which was unusual. He didn't like it. Normally Shihu would be up by now and ready to face a new day, and that would bring a smile to Sasuke's face.

But not today. No. Today, his little girl was waking up at some stranger's house, sleeping in some stranger's bed, eating some stranger's food. The thought made Sasuke feel angry and sick. Dammit, Neji didn't deserve Shihu! No one did except him and Naruto!

Naruto. Oh god, Naruto was gone. Sasuke's stomach turned as it always did when he thought of his deceased husband. He sat alone at his table, plate of untouched food in front of him, face pale and hair unkempt. He sighed sadly and pushed the food away from him so his head could fall cleanly onto the table. He'd made enough messes to last a lifetime and he didn't need one more

And what made the day worse was that he had to wait one week before he could see Shihu again. It was only Tuesday. He wasn't legally allowed to see his daughter again until Saturday. And then he only had two precious days to spend with her. And they had to be spent under the watchful eye of a court liaison.

"_Dammit_!" Sasuke swore under his breath. An annoyingly familiar sting in his eyes alerted him of the coming tears and he viciously tried to blink them away. They still came though. Those traitorous tears fell from his eyes even though he told them not to. It wasn't many but still. His father had always told him that tears were a sign of weakness. That emotion was a sign of weakness.

Then Naruto had come along and Sasuke had changed his attitude. And fallen in love.

But now Naruto was gone, and Sasuke's views were slowly morphing back to what they had been. And damn it all, he wasn't trying to stop them!

Blinking, Sasuke thought back to his life with Naruto. Remembered how many times he had cried. And how much better he had felt when he let the tears out. How much more open he felt when he was with Naruto, like he could share his emotions, let them out and not be ashamed of being reprimanded. He hadn't needed to concentrate on impressing his father, on surpassing his brother. Naruto had only ever wanted _him_. And he had always put _him_ first. Had always valued _him_ more than anything. And then later, Shihu as well.

And in return, Sasuke did those things for Naruto. Sasuke loved Naruto as Naruto loved him. But now, what was he to do? Naruto was gone. Shihu was gone. Their life was gone!

So now, all Sasuke could do was let the tears come. Let them fall as they will and just _stop caring_ about it. So he did.

A knock on his door just barely got his attention. It was so soft, he barely heard it. And the constant storm raging in his mind and heart only made it harder to hear.

With much more effort than was healthy, Sasuke pushed himself up and wandered to the door. He opened it in several dead and choppy movements. Tsukiko jumped at the noise. Sasuke blinked and his brow furrowed.

"Tsukiko?" his voice was quiet and scratchy, as it always was in the morning. Tsukiko misinterpreted it as anger. She flinched away from him and bit her lip nervously.

"Um…I know I—I said all this before, Mr. Uchiha, but…I just…I'm so sorry." Her voice was little more than a whisper and it was clear to Sasuke that she truly regretted what she'd done. He internally rolled his eyes.

"Tsukiko, I told you," he said, schooling his voice to be patient. "It's not your fault. I would've done the same thing were I in your position." Tsukiko shook her head.

"No, Mr. Uchiha, I—please, can you just accept it? I—I don't know what else I can do that might help you…" she trailed off and turned red. Sasuke sighed softly.

"Tsukiko, it's okay," he reiterated, firmly. "I understand your reason. And I'm not angry at you. Why don't you just go home and get some rest?" Tsukiko looked at him in disbelief.

"Mr. Uchiha," she said softly but matter-of-factly. "I can tell when you're angry and it's really clear that that's the case right now. I'm just trying to help, and when you--"

"Who says I need any help, Tsukiko?" Sasuke snapped, his temper finally lost. "Who says I need things like useless apologies and unnecessary pity? God _dammit_, my husband just _died_! Give me a little time to cope with that before you come over and grovel at my feet, will you!?" Tsukiko stared at Sasuke, mouth agape, eyes wide, body frozen. After a moment, her eyes closed and she gritted her teeth, her body quivering and shaking with what had to be anger.

"You'v _had _time!" she shouted angrily, causing Sasuke to jump. "You've had plenty of time to at least adjust to life without Mr. Uzumaki! But you're still moping around like you did the day he died! And I know that you have another reason for acting this way, but I'm trying to apologize for that! Mr. Uchiha, I've been _killing _myself for the past few days for doing this to you! I know it's not _all_ my fault, but a lot of the blame does rest with me! And the least you could do is accept my apology and act naturally around me!" The raven-haired man took an involuntary step back and stared at her. Tsukiko had never acted like this before! He had always seen her as the kind and timid high school girl who always took perfect care of Shihu when neither he nor Naruto was around.

"I knew Mr. Uzumaki too," she continued, undeterred. "And I miss him too. Not nearly as much as you do, but I'm still suffering here." At this, Sasuke grew angry. Tsukiko could have no claim to any suffering that had to do with Naruto! She hadn't known him as Sasuke had. She hadn't loved him as Sasuke had and she certainly didn't miss him as Sasuke did, at least she got that part right.

"Don't talk to me about suffering," Sasuke hissed to her through gritted teeth. "You don't know suffering like I do! You didn't lose a friend and companion so suddenly like I did!" Tsukiko lifted her hands in exasperation and gestured furiously towards the Uchiha.

"_See_!?" she all but shouted. "This is _you_! This always has been and always will be you! You always blame _everything_ for your problems! It doesn't matter what it is! You, me, your friends, the government, _whatever_! So long as it's _there_, it's fair game! You never _do _anything to _solve_ anything; you are the most angsty person I've ever met! And what's more, you seem to _like it_!" Before anything more could be said, the girl turned around and stormed angrily away, leaving Sasuke standing there, dumbfounded.

The Uchiha stared after her even after she was long gone and he released his held breath. Doesn't _do _anything? That wasn't true! Sasuke had done plenty to try and rid himself of his problems. He had…he had…

Sasuke blinked and cringed.

He had gotten drunk. He had hurt his daughter. He had destroyed himself. _That_ was what he did.

* * *

"Shihu?" Neji's soft voice penetrated Shihu's mind and she tried to block it out. _It's not Daddy's voice…It's not Father's voice…_ she thought. _It's…someone else's voice…_ She buried her face in her pillow and pulled her blankets over her head. Outside her door, she heard a small breath.

"Shihu, please come out," Neji said patiently. "You don't have to talk to me. You don't even have to look at me…But you need to go to school. You've got to get ready. Please…" The girl choked back a sob but carefully got out of her bed, walking over to her door. She opened the door a crack and looked out at the unreadable face that towered over her.

"G-go awa—ay," she sniffled. Neji's eyes twitched and his hands quivered, but it was barely noticeable. He took a breath and gave her an empty smile.

"Alright," he murmured. If Shihu hadn't been as distraught as she was, she would've taken notice of the hurt sound in the Hyuuga's voice. Smoothly, the man about-faced and walked away. Shihu whimpered and shut her bedroom door to prepare for school.

Backpack, schoolwork from weeks ago, her favorite jumper that had been her present from Father and Daddy this past Christmas and of course, her favorite orange sneakers. And then she was heading downstairs, absentmindedly twiddling her wild hair around one finger wondering what she would say to Neji.

She found him in the kitchen, standing in front of a window, looking at the closed drapes as if they were the most important things in the world. On the stove, bacon was sizzling dejectedly, trying and failing to keep the brunette's attention. Neji sighed and brought a hand up to his face. He began to rub his temple and Shihu took a step towards him, looking at him worriedly.

"Neji, are you getting a headache?" she asked shyly. Neji turned around to face her and his eyes glazed over with something she didn't recognize. He smiled and shook his head, but said nothing. Going back to the stove, Neji checked on the progress of the bacon and moved over to the toaster to peer inside at the slowly burning bread. Shihu looked at him.

"What about cereal?" she asked confusedly. "Don't you have any cereal?" Neji turned to her with that same smile and nodded.

"I do," he affirmed. "Fruit loops. I'll get them for you." Shihu's face brightened, if only a little.

"I love fruit loops!" she exclaimed. "They're my favorite!" Neji's smile faltered and for a moment, Shihu felt a little bit warmer when she looked at his face. It seemed more real than before.

"Mine too," Neji responded sincerely. "They've been my weakness ever since I was a child." He chuckled.

"I remember, I would have them every day and my mother would always try to tell me that they didn't have any different flavors, but I knew better." Neji winked at her. "Don't ever let anyone tell you that fruit loops don't have any fruity flavor, it's just not true." Shihu beamed and nodded excitedly. Forgetting her discomfort, she skipped up to the table and hopped up into the chair, waiting expectantly for her fruity morning treat.

Smiling to himself, Neji turned his back to her and retrieved a bowl from the cupboard above the stove and then grabbed the fruit loops from the pantry closet where most of his nonperishable food was kept. Toucan Sam smiled back at him from the box where the perfect bowl of fruit loops could be seen protruding from the bottom. Neji shook his head fondly and placed the bowl and the box in front of Shihu and allowed her to pour herself the amount she wanted. She filled it all the way to the brim. Neji raised a brow at this but said nothing. Shihu looked around for a moment and then asked, "Where's the milk?" Neji blinked and then hurried to the fridge.

"What kind?" he asked, opening the refrigerator door and peering inside. He turned to see the girl looking at him as though he were dumb.

"The red kind," she said simply. Neji looked at her for a moment before turning back to seek out the 'red kind.' There were only two gallons of milk in his fridge; skim milk and whole milk. The Hyuuga was about to turn back to Shihu and ask her what she meant when he noticed something; the whole milk had a red cap. Neji almost hit his forehead with the palm of his hand. Of course that's what Shihu meant. He should've been able to realize that. Reaching into the cold and icy freezer, the brunette man extracted the 'red kind' of milk and placed it by Shihu, shutting the door with his hip.

"Thank you," Shihu said politely but hurriedly, her eyes on her monstrous bowl of cereal. She grabbed the milk greedily and impatiently ripped the cap off, setting it down clumsily on the table. Neji watched in amusement as she lifted the jug off the table with both hands, tipped it carefully and poured the white liquid out onto her fruit loops. The bowl slowly filled with milk and the fruit loops rose. Several of them fell out onto the tablecloth and Shihu laughed, placing the milk jug down before the bowl completely overflowed. Neji watched her silently, more affected by this simple action than he should've been.

Watching her like this, Neji began to remember what his days as a child had been like. How innocently carefree they had been and, mostly, how much fun he had had in the morning eating _his_ fruit loops.

But something else he remembered was that he had never once eaten a bowl of fruit loops while he was married to Tenten. He had stopped as soon as he started dating her because he was so afraid that she would think it was childish and stupid. And as time had gone on, he had slowly forgotten about his love of the wonderful sugary cereal.

But now, it would be _so _easy to grab a bowl himself and do just what he used to do; eat fruit loops until someone took the box away.

It was sorely tempting. Neji found it harder to resist than he ever thought it would be. And when Shihu looked up at him in askance, mouth full of fruit loops, and asked, "Aren't you going to have some too?" Neji threw restraint to the winds and boldly poured himself a bowl of sugary cereal. He turned to Shihu and smiled.

"Could you pass the milk?" he asked, reveling in the sound of the words he had never really used in that context since he was sixteen years old. Shihu nodded and absently handed him the milk. Neji hid his eagerness as he poured the white stuff into his own bowl and began to eat.

It was an interesting sight, the adult man eating fruit loops right along side the elementary child. Interesting in a very homely way. One would never think that these people had gone through so much if they were to see them now.

"Do you know what school I go to, Neji?" Shihu asked suddenly, fruit loops in her mouth. Neji turned to her and chuckled. She looked so cute with her bulging cheeks and that little bit of milk trailing down her cheek. Without thinking, Neji reached out with his napkin and wiped the offending bit of liquid away. Shihu blinked and giggled, blushing cutely.

"No, I'm afraid I don't know what school you go to," Neji confessed. "But if you tell me, I'm sure I'd be able to find it. Does your daddy usually drop you off, or do you take a bus?" Shihu nodded, turning her attention back to her cereal.

"Daddy usually takes me," she answered, swallowing her mouthful. "He says that he doesn't want to let me go on the bus 'cause he doesn't want people making fun of me." She shrugged, indicating that she didn't know what the heck her daddy was talking about. Neji's expression turned slightly grave at hearing that. He understood, of course. In a word, it was discrimination. There was probably a lot of prejudice against a girl with two gay fathers. And against the fathers themselves. Neji made a mental note to ask Sasuke about that the next time he saw him.

"Alright, Shihu," Neji said. "I suppose, then, that I'll have to take you." The little blonde girl nodded absently, busy making a face with her fruit loops. The Hyuuga watched her wistfully for a moment and then turned away, bringing his mind over to the task at hand; getting Shihu to school on time.

He walked over to a little blue backpack on the counter and began to organize the objects within; a lunch box, complete with lunch, a pencil case, complete with colored pencils, a set of notebooks, and several sheets of paper that Neji assumed to be homework that Shihu failed to complete in the face of everything that happened.

Back at the table, Shihu hopped down from her chair and took her bowl over to the sink, standing up on her tippy toes, trying to reach the faucet.

"Neji, I can't reach!" she complained, scrabbling for the teasing faucet. Neji chuckled from somewhere behind her and a second later, she was being lifted up by a pair of strong arms in which she felt safe, despite herself. Neji set her up on the side of the counter and Shihu blinked. Now that was something Daddy never let her do! No matter how much she begged! But who was she to tell Neji that, when she had wanted to stand up there for so long? Grinning to herself, Shihu crouched down carefully, aware of Neji's hands resting lightly on her hips, ready to catch her if she fell, and began to rinse out her cereal bowl.

"Daddy always tells me to clean up after himself," the girl explained. "He says to not be like Father, 'cause Father never cleans up after himself." Shihu sounded proud of herself.

"Daddy was always telling Father to be more like me," she continued. "'Cause Father was always so messy and I was always clean. Daddy sometimes told Father that his eyes should've been brown and not blue, 'cause he was so full of sh--" Neji's eyes widened and he clamped a hand over the girl's mouth. She started and yelped, falling backwards, cushioned by Neji's arms. She ripped his hand off her mouth and turned to him indignantly and opened her mouth to protest but the Hyuuga cut her off.

"That's a bad word, Shihu," he explained. "The one you were about to say. I'm sure your daddy didn't mean for you to hear it when he said it, and I'm even more sure that he wouldn't want you to say it." Shihu's eyes were wide and she nodded vigorously.

"Are there any other words I shouldn't say?" she said. "Because I heard Daddy say something when he was in his room one time, and I remember my teacher telling off one of the boys at school for saying it." Neji's brow furrowed. He was pretty sure he knew the word to which Shihu was referring as well as the situation in which Sasuke had used said word.

"Um, why don't you just whisper what he said to me and I'll tell you if it was bad or not," Neji said carefully, entirely unsure as to whether or not he _wanted _to hear what had transpired that Shihu had heard.

She nodded and leaned up to Neji's ear, cupping her hands around her mouth secretively. Neji turned his head and moved his hair away from his ear as Shihu whispered softly what she had heard.

Neji blushed. Immediately allowing his hair to fall in front of him once more to hide the color, the Hyuuga proceeded to hastily explain what had happened.

"Um, well, Shihu, that's a _very_ bad word and I'm sure that both your daddy and your father were just...unaware of what they were saying at the time," he ventured cautiously. Shihu cocked her head and looked at him confusedly.

"But they sounded like they knew what they were saying," she argued unknowingly. "Father's voice was all low and growly and Daddy's voice was all impatient and annoyed like it always is. And he said he wanted Father to hurry, so how couldn't he know what he was talking about?" Neji groaned and covered his face with his hands, completely aware of the heat that was burning his cheeks. After a moment, he sighed and faced the girl like the man he was.

"Shihu," he said seriously. "They were doing something very adult that you should probably ask your daddy about in the distant future." Shihu cocked her head to the side. An indication that she had absolutely no idea what he was talking about.

Neji lifted her off the counter and placed her gently on the floor, handing her the now neatly organized blue backpack.

"Alright, Shihu, head to the car now," he said firmly. Shihu nodded, still slightly confused and walked to the front door. As soon as she was out of sight, Neji let out a relieved sigh and wiped the back of his hand over his forehead, wearily retrieving his keys and phone.

Shihu situated herself in the front of the car and was happily swinging her feet back and forth when Neji came.

"Does your daddy normally let you sit in the front of the car?" Neji asked. Shihu hesitated and then shook her head.

"No," she said dejectedly. "Only sometimes, when I've been really good." She paused and turned to Neji imploringly.

"But I promise I'll be good!" she pleaded. "I'll buckle up and I won't open the door or anything! Pleeeeaaase, please, please, please, please, please!" Neji smiled and shook his head, almost laughing at the child's antics. He loved her already.

"Very well, Shihu," he said. "But you have to do everything you said, fair?" Instinctively, he stuck his pinky out, as he had used to do with his mother and smiled sincerely at the little child. Shihu blinked and smiled back, reaching out and wrapping her own pinky around Neji's.

"Fair!" she agreed happily. The Hyuuga nodded and buckled his own seatbelt. He put his key into the ignition and started the car, all the while watching Shihu, who looked more at home with him than she had before.

There were still those signals that she unconsciously gave off that indicated that she would still rather be anywhere but there. The way she slid over in her seat as far as it would allow. The way she kept her eyes on the window, the way she leaned away from Neji. It was all still there. It was still clear to him that she didn't and wouldn't ever consider him family to her. It was one big contradiction of itself. Just when he thought he was taking a step forward, she surprised him by taking two steps backwards.

Sighing to himself, Neji backed the car out into the road and sped away. At the stop sign, he turned to Shihu.

"Can you tell me the name of the school that you go to, Shihu?" he asked. She thought for a moment before responding,

"Konoha Elementary School." Neji nodded.

"I figured as much," he mumbled to himself. Shihu shrugged and turned back to the window.

They drove in silence for the duration of the ride until Neji's phone went off and both of them jumped.

"It's Sasuke," Neji said softly, checking the caller ID. Quickly attaching his ear piece to his phone and then placing it tenderly on his ear, Neji answered the call.

"Mr. Uchiha," he said into the mini microphone. "Do you need something?"

"Oh, Neji, you're there." He sounded slightly relieved. "I tried to call your house, but you weren't there, I kinda panicked a little, heh." Neji couldn't find it in him to chuckle so he nodded.

"Oh, well, I apologize for having worried you," he replied. "I was just taking Shihu to school. I always have my cell on, though, and I always carry it with me, for future reference."

"Oh, well, thanks," Sasuke replied slightly awkwardly, in Neji's opinion. "I just wanted to make sure everything was…okay, you know? Um, do you think you could walk Shihu into the school and to homeroom? I, uh, usually do that just to make sure that she doesn't…well…" He broke off and the tension was tangible. Neji swallowed noiselessly and attempted to switch the subject.

"Do you normally pick her up as well?" he asked. Sasuke immediately got the gist and followed up smoothly.

"Yeah, I do," he said. "But, every Friday, she has a meeting with the school councilor to talk about her week and the ups and downs and such. On Fridays, I usually pick Shihu up at about four in the afternoon, instead of three." Neji nodded, turning smoothly onto the school road.

"Alright," he said. "Thank you, Mr. Uchiha." There was a pause for a long moment, before Sasuke sighed.

"Sasuke," he mumbled. Neji blinked.

"What?" he asked, confused. Sasuke sighed again.

"Sasuke," he reiterated a little louder. "Just call me Sasuke." Neji nodded slowly, before he realized that the Uchiha couldn't see such an action and needed a verbal answer.

"Thank you, Sasuke," he said, trying to sound sincere. "I appreciate it."

"Whatever," Sasuke muttered. A little more sincerely, he said, "Tell Shihu that I love her." And then he hung up. Neji sighed. And hung up. Shihu didn't turn to him, not even to ask if it was her daddy, which surprised and disappointed Neji. He had wanted an excuse to talk to her, even if it was only to answer a question.

He pulled into the parking lot of the school and quickly parked as close to the building as possible.

"Alright, we're here," he said to Shihu, unbuckling his seatbelt and removing his keys. Shihu nodded and unbuckled her own seatbelt and quickly got out of the car. She immediately started walking towards the building, a look of excitement on her face, and Neji followed after her, a look of…_something_ on his face.

He caught up to her just as she reached the door and pulled it open for her. She ran in and sought out her friends, while Neji held the door open for another woman and her child. The woman smiled and thanked Neji, who responded in kind and then both proceeded to enter the school. Neji found Shihu near the principal's office, talking to another girl about her age, this one brunette and slightly shorter than the blonde. They were both smiling brightly at each other and appeared to be catching up on everything Shihu had missed during her long absence.

Very suddenly, a bell sounded and Shihu rolled her eyes, turning to head towards what Neji assumed was her homeroom with the other girl. Quietly, the Hyuuga followed, honoring Sasuke's request to take Shihu to homeroom, yet giving the girl some room to talk with her friend.

"Excuse me," a woman's voice said. "I don't think I've seen you around here before. Do you have a child who goes to school here?" Neji turned and saw the woman for whom he had opened the door earlier. He smiled and nodded.

"Yes, Shihu Uzumaki," he affirmed. "I'm taking care of her for the time being." He chose his words carefully, not wanting to reveal too much of Sasuke's situation to a complete stranger. The woman nodded sympathetically.

"Yes, I heard about her father's death," she said. "It must be very hard for her. And Mr. Uchiha." Neji tilted his head slightly.

"You know Mr. Uchiha?" he asked. The woman nodded.

"Yes, from all the PTA meetings he attended," she replied. "Very nice man. Really seemed to love his child. He never really contributed at all, but he was fun to talk to, if you ever got him out of his shell, that is. Seems the only one who ever succeeded in that was his late husband." She sighed, shaking her head sadly. Neji's brow knitted together.

"If you don't mind my asking," he proceeded cautiously. "How is a homosexual marriage regarded by the majority of this school's parents?" The woman blinked and thought for a moment.

"Well," she mused slowly. "I don't think that it's really much of a problem for most of us here. These parents are all very open-minded, and besides that, are just more concerned with their own child's education than they are of another child's parent's sexuality, so it's never really much of a problem.

"However, there always have to be some rotten apples in the bunch. There are several parents who really don't approve of such relations, but no one so far has ever voiced any opposition. I certainly don't think any one of these parents would be interested in invoking the wrath of the school, or Sasuke Uchiha, for that matter." She turned to Neji and smiled.

"Now that man would do anything for his family," she remarked matter-of-factly. Neji returned the smile and nodded.

"I know." Neji turned back to the happily chattering Shihu and let out deep contemplative breath. Beside him, the woman had turned her attentions back to her own child and was slowly drifting away from Neji and towards her own child's homeroom.

Neji continued on his path until Shihu turned to him and told him that she was ok, he didn't need to go into the homeroom with her.

"I need to meet your teacher at least once before I leave, Shihu, alright?" he said, kneeling down to give her a stern look. Shihu had retreated a little bit but nodded. Neji smiled and stood back up, turning to walk into Room 223, Shihu's homeroom. A little sign on the door indicated to Neji that a Ms. Oda was Shihu's teacher.

Shihu followed behind him, whispering secrets to her friend, who was looking at Neji with a little blush on her face.

Neji walked up to a young woman at a desk near the front of the room and gently cleared his throat.

"Ms. Oda, I presume?" he asked politely. The woman turned to him and gave a warm smile. She stood up and extended a slender hand.

"You presume correctly," she said, and Neji noted that her voice was soft and sweet and everything he imagined the perfect teacher to be. "And you are?" Neji reached out and shook her hand and allowed his mouth to take on a general upward curve.

"I am Neji Hyuuga, Shihu's temporary guardian," he responded. The teacher laughed lightly and released Neji's hand.

"Temporary?" she asked and then paused. "Wait a moment. Are you the one who…? That is, Mr. Uchiha, he…" She broke off and gave a chuckle.

"Boy, I must sound like a rambling fool right now," she said heartily. "I'm sorry. What I'm trying so unsuccessfully to say is that I am aware of the details of Mr. Uchiha's…situation." Neji gave a nod, prompting her to continue. She took the hint gracefully.

"I received a detailed account of the whole thing from little Shihu over there," she indicated fondly to Shihu, sitting at the back of the room talking with her friend, "And I received the same detailed account from Mr. Uchiha himself. I'll try to help her as best I can, but I'm not sure how open to discussion this topic will be with her." At this, the young woman turned to Shihu with a worried expression and Neji found that he enjoyed the appearance of her features much better when they weren't furrowed with anxiety.

But then he was struck by a sudden thought. Looking at her curiously, Neji asked,

"Are you the school councilor?" She turned to him and nodded, smile back in place.

"Guilty," she said with a chuckle. "I work as the councilor after school during weekdays. Sometimes, I get calls on the weekends, but not all that often. Although, if anyone has a right to ask me in on the weekends, it's Shihu. I mean, really, I don't know anyone who's had to go through so much at such a young age! I don't know anyone who's had to go through that, period! And she seems to be handling it so well." She turned once again to look affably at the little blonde child. Neji followed her gaze and found himself agreeing with her. It was true, Shihu did have more of a right than anyone else he knew to seek help, though she never did. Neji admired that.

"Ms. Oda," he said. "How well are you acquainted with Sasuke and Shihu?" Ms. Oda chewed at her bottom lip as she contemplated her answer.

"Well," she started slowly. "I…knew Mr. Uzumaki very little, he never really showed up to any of our meetings, that was mainly Mr. Uchiha. I don't mean to sound stereotypical or as though I'm labeling, but I do think that Mr. Uchiha took on the role of the 'active mother' in that relationship. And as for that man, well, I knew him much better than I had known his husband. Mr. Uchiha is the kind of person who really actively participates in his child's life, academic or not, and he and I, I'd like to believe, became fairly close. So, in retrospect, I believe that I was, more or less, fairly acquainted with Shihu's family." She looked at Neji with an earnest look and the Hyuuga was loath to admit that he was hard pressed to find a response. Luckily, the young teacher saved him.

"What of you, Mr. Hyuuga?" she asked, genuinely curious. "Do you know the family very well?" Neji thought for a moment and then shook his head.

"Not very well, actually," he confessed. "I actually was incredibly close to Naruto and didn't have the pleasure of knowing his husband or his daughter all that well. If you know the details of the situation, then you should know already that I was appointed Shihu's godfather." The woman nodded and then jerked, as though remembering something.

"Oh! I'm sorry, Mr. Hyuuga," she exclaimed sheepishly. "I never fully introduced myself! My full name is Moriko Oda." She moved as though to present her hand to him, but stopped, realizing that she had already performed that part of the introduction. Neji smiled and nodded.

"Well, Ms. Oda, it was a pleasure to meet you," he said. "I would love to continue this, so perhaps, if it would not be too forward, I'll give you my number and we can set up some sort of outing?" Moriko nodded in what Neji interpreted to be a politely eager way. She turned to her desk and retrieved a slip of paper and a pen. She began to scribble a number down and Neji took the time to really take in her appearance.

Soft red hair pulled back into a firm and neat bun, thick reading glasses resting atop the bridge of her nose, smooth and slightly tanned skin, a slender figure and an absolutely marvelous complexion. Neji had to admit, this woman, Moriko Oda, was striking. He admired her sense of style as well. No flashy adornments, no unnecessary embellishments, just a plain and simple dress meant to hug the figure, yet that advocated a manner of sophistication and poise that Neji simply loved in a woman, complete with a nice set of black shoes and a lovely beaded bracelet that rested round her left wrist.

A moment later, Moriko was straightening and handing a neat little slip to Neji, a slight pink color creeping onto her cheeks.

"The first one's my cell number, and the second one's my home number," she explained. Neji nodded.

"Thank you," he said with a small grin. "I hope you do realize that you've just given a complete stranger your phone number, and that anything that happens is completely your own fault." He knew he was taking a big step, and it occurred to him that perhaps it was a little too soon for playful banter, but, in his defense, it had been an incredibly long time since anyone had ever made him feel like this, even if 'this' wasn't all that much, and he had enjoyed speaking to Moriko, even if he hadn't done much of the speaking. He decided that maybe Lee was right.

Maybe it was time he gave some serious thought to moving on. Maybe Moriko could help him do just that. Maybe he needed to try and go halfway again. Who knows what would meet him in the middle?

Either way, Neji Hyuuga left Konoha Elementary that day with a new number and a new resolve, leaving behind a blushing school teacher who was eagerly anticipating the call of a handsome and kind man who could possibly be her first serious relationship.

* * *

**Uh-oh! Am I really making Neji attracted to that woman?? Is there really gonna be a relationship between them?? WHAT ABOUT SASUKE?!?!?!? HA! I just though of this as I was writing and I had to put it in! What's a love story without an annoying Mary Sue character who always seems to get in the way?? **

**Question: Does my OC seem a little too happy to anyone? She did to me and I started to wonder how the hell Neji could ever want to go out with her. But oh well, I wrote it and now I'm going with it! **

**And besides, Sasuke's busy being a jerk, so, yeah. **

**Don't worry, there'll be more interactions between Neji and Sasuke in future chptrs, which means that Neji can slowly break down Sasuke's emotional barriers and make him fall in love all over again!! Yay! Review, please!  
**


	10. Author's Note

**Author's Note**

Hey, guys! I know it's been only forever since I last uploaded...anything on this site. But I just wanted to say that my laziness is just so problematic. I can't seem to get off my ass and just crank out a chapter for anything, despite having plenty of ideas for all of these fics! Ugh, and school is getting seriously challenging, so I've had to take a break from fun computer time altogether for a while. I'm not proud. But, anywho, since I've last updated any of my fics, during my long dry spell, I've sort of drifted away from these stories as I've written them. I'm not giving up on any of them, be assured (if ya care! Jk), but my writing style has changed so much in a year and I really kinda want to redo some of these. Basically, this author's note is me asking if anyone would be against me doing some major editing for my stories.

For example, the Mary Sue child in this story (Shihu) would need to be seriously reevaluated because I just cannot stand that girl anymore now! The Mary Sue in one of my other stories, who happens to have the name of one of the canonical Naruto characters, is now officially killed off and was never in that story AT ALL.

Ok, and another thing, I fervently believe in finishing all of my stories, so I will try very hard to get them finished as quickly as I can, so don't give up on me! I'm just gonna be tweaking and rewriting some of them. Not completely, I don't mean I'm going to completely change the plot or anything like that, but I am going to try to improve the interactions between characters, the behavior of characters, the unnecessary cliches (keyword: UNNECESSARY), and the flow of one scene from the next. Until I'm finished with all that, I'll just be throwing oneshots out there or something so no one who visits my page is left bored.

Alright, well, that's about it. Once again, I'm sorry for the long absence and I'll get writing again soon!

~NejiKikyoAnimeRose


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